In the Dailies

I've moved!

2009-01-26T15:39:00.003-05:00

This blog is now at www.inthedailies.wordpress.com. You can also find me at www.TanyaDennisBooks.com. Don't worry - all my posts and all your wonderful comments have been copied to the new site too. See you there!

A retraction (of sorts)

2009-01-24T10:04:00.003-05:00

A number of people emailed and commented about my post of inauguration thoughts. I'd like to respond and prevent any further distortions or conclusions based on what I wrote.

I'll not take back what I said because, as I stated in the first paragraph, those were uncensored thoughts, an honest stream of consciousness. Politics are tricky, and everyone involved is passionate. That often leaves independents, like me, battling both sides.

I am not proclaiming blind support of President Obama. We differ on some very key issues which I will continue to follow and guard. Neither am I proclaiming blind support of President Bush. We also differed on some very key issues. While I am not at all happy with Obama's position on abortion, I am glad to see someone new in the White House. I believe our nation needs change. I will not like all of the change, I'm sure. Already changes have been made that trouble me. But Obama is our President and, as I stated on Tuesday, that position is ordained by God and requires our respect (Romans 13:1).

One clarification I do need to make. I wrote: "I understand [Obama] writes his own speeches." First, I did not say my understanding was absolute truth, only that this was what I understood to be true. Secondly, I have since researched this further (at the encouragement of you, dear readers) and found that Obama does indeed write many of his own speeches, just not all of them and not all alone. He wrote his first book, Dreams From My Father, entirely on his own. Since becoming a more public figure with greater responsibilities, he has employed a team of writers who helped him write his second book and a number of his speeches since. The White House gives credit for the Inauguration Speech to President Obama, though I'm sure this is mostly because he delivered it.

Here are some links to interesting articles about this topic. The first two talk about Obama and other presidents who were also writers. The second two dive into the relationship between Obama and his chief speech writer, Jon Favreau. All four articles are quite fascinating.

How Obama Writes His Speeches, Time Magazine, 28 Aug 08

All the Presidents' Literature, The Wall Street Journal, 10 Jan 2009

Obama inauguration: Words of history ... crafted by 27-year-old in Starbucks, The Guardian, 20 Jan 2009

What Would Obama Say?, New York Times, 20 Jan 2008

Book Blog Tour: The Baby Fat Diet

2009-01-23T07:22:00.000-05:00

It's time. My "baby" is three and a half years old, and while I have a dear friend who still blames her twenty-three-year-old daughter for five extra pounds, I think that there must be a statute of limitations on pregnancy weight. Sadly, I think my excuses expired a while back.

I want to tell you about this book, but before I do, let me share a little about my story. (I hate diets, so I feel the need to explain why I'm promoting one.)

I was either pregnant or nursing for three years straight. My weight boomeranged over fifty pounds more than once. My poor scale never knew what to expect, and now here I am, almost six years after this journey began and still 30 pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight. I know I'll never get back to wedding weight. I'm not aiming for that, but I would like to be rid of my muffin top hips and sausage-like thighs.

I have tried! I did a week on Atkins (only to annoy everyone with my whining and complaining); I tried the South Beach Diet for two months, but only lost my appetite (thanks to bland, unimaginative food). I tried a gym, but quickly realized I don't like public nor shared torture. I bought a pilates machine to work out at home, but have yet to be consistent in using it. Oh, and I've bought plenty of other diet cookbooks, but with a husband who can instantly tell the difference between whole wheat pasta and regular, whole fat cheese and part-skim, none of the cookbooks stuck around for long. I don't have the time nor energy to make multiple entrees for each meal, so if Rick doesn't like it, it doesn't return to our table.

Now, a new part of the story. I received The Baby Fat Diet through The Blog Tour Spot and decided to implement a few of the strategies even before finishing the book. I lost 3 pounds in one week. I know three pounds doesn't sound like a lot, but it is the first time in a long time that my weight has gone down and stayed down. Weight fluctuates from day to day, but this decrease, while just a start, has remained.

So, what's in the book? Who wrote it and what's it about?

Monica Bearden and Shara Aaron, both moms, both registered dieticians, wrote the book together. They understand the hectic schedules of moms and they understand the need for regular doses of chocolate. Isn't that great?

Great information floods this book. I can't possibly cover it all; you'll have to grab your own copy, but here are a few of my favorite inclusions.

When to buy organic vs. when the label is more expensive than it's worth
The difference between hunger and appetite, knowing when to eat
Portion control, knowing how much to eat
How to tell a fad diet from an authentic, healthy diet
How to read labels and know what you're really getting
How to tell real health foods from "healthy" marketing tricks
Tips for maintaining a balanced diet
Ways to excercise with little ones under foot

There really is a ton of great stuff in here! From BMI charts and calorie suggestions to recipes, shopping lists, menus and more.

Like I said, I didn't follow all the suggestions. I haven't even finished reading the book, but what I have read makes tremendous sense and fits into my life. I can't reconfigure my life around a weight-loss program, but I can control my portions. I can choose a healthy, delicious snack instead of a bag of chips. I can eat slower. I can dance with the kids and run around instead of popping in a video. These are easy steps. They're small steps. And they're making a difference.

Click here to purchase the book through Amazon.

You can visit the authors' blog to find more tips and recipes. Also, click on the links below to visit other blogs on the tour this week. See what they have to say about it.

5 Minutes for Books
A Little Whine and Cheese
A Peek at My Bookshelf
Be Your Best Mom
Behind the Mountain
Blog Tour Spot
Bookish Mom Reviews
Camy’s Loft
Fictionary
Fit Family
i don’t believe in grammar
In God’s Image
In the Dailies
Kells Creative Musings
Lighthouse Academy
Mommy Snacks.Net
Mommy’s Must Haves
Momopoly
Quiverfullfamily.com
Real Women Scrap
Refresh My Soul
Roni’s Weigh
The Journey of Writer Danica Favorite
The Law, Books and Life
The Pitter Patter of Losing Pounds
The Sassy Pear
The Unadorned Book Review
wandering, wonderings of a whacked-out woman

Ruthie, my sweet Ruthie

2009-01-21T07:23:00.003-05:00

If you missed yesterday’s early post, you may not realize Ruthie is my laptop. You know, “where you go, I will go …” She’s been by my side faithfully for more than two years, but lately she’s not been feeling too well. What is the lifespan of a laptop?

The good news: Rick was able to revive her last night! She was up and running beautifully just long enough for me to back up all my stuff on Rick’s fortress in the basement and, just to be very thorough, on disk. She got stuck on a prompt just before bed, so I left her on overnight to finish the copying of files. This morning, she re-entered her coma.

I’m so sad! I’ve been joking for sometime that when she dies I’ll get mac. Have you heard of Scrivener? Well, it looks like a super cool - like really super cool! - writing program. It, however, only works on macs. So it’s been this running joke that I’ll quickly replace her with something newer and better, but now I just feel awful. Like a sleezy spouse reveling in a blatant affair. And my sweet Ruthie never knew how much I appreciate her, how much I adore her, how I couldn’t have done all this without her and …

Yes, I know it’s just a computer. But she's my computer! The first one that has ever been all mine. Rick gave her to me after my first article was published. It's symbolic of his faith in me, that he thinks I can do anything as long as I have the right tools. Isn't he great? I love him.

Believe it or not, when I started this post, my purpose was not to stage a memorial service. Really. Now that that’s done, I can tell you: I’m still here! Ruthie may be on her last leg and quite unpredictable in her reliability, but I’ve got a lot coming up for you this week. Stay tuned! I shall brave the frigid basement and re-write posts all for you, my friends.

I’m participating in a book blog tour this week; I hope to have the post up later today or tomorrow. Also, I want to rehash Christmas a bit (with pictures!) and share some Sunday Morning Leftovers. You don’t want to miss it. So, even if I’m erratic in my posting, stick around.

Inauguration Thoughts

2009-01-20T16:01:00.005-05:00

More often than not I script my life. I think about what I'll say long before I say it. Usually this is a good habit, but sometimes it leaves me saying nothing. I worry too much about what others will think of me or my thoughts. This paralyzes my tongue and magnifies my timidity.

Today was an historic day! I was brought to tears while watching the ceremonies. We have come a long, long way in a very short time. However, keeping with my typical approach to politics, I've said nothing. There is much going on in my head, much I want to verbalize. So here it is, my uncensored thoughts about today's inauguration.

President Obama is extremely eloquent. I understand he writes his own speeches. I find this impressive and admirable. In fact, this elevates my respect for him. He appears to be a brilliant man with lofty ambitions for our nation. I'm glad. Our nation needs someone who exudes strength, confidence and integrity. I see these in our new President. While I do not agree with all of his positions (abortion being the greatest dissidence), I believe he will serve our nation well. I hope and pray he will.

We stand at a precipice with a vast unknown before us. Change is coming, and I don't know what form it will take. It's a little scary, but it's also exciting. I can rejoice today because whether or not I voted for this man, God chose him to lead our country. God sets all the kings and rulers in their place. I know our Creator is in control; I know my Savior reigns and He will have His way.

I was impressed with the send-off given to President Bush. Again, I don't agree with everything he did or said, but God put him in this position for the time he held it. He served our country for eight long years and he deserves our respect. I am proud of President and First Lady Obama for sending off the Bushes in such an honorable way.

The commentator said this is the first time in history a newly elected president has escorted the retiring presidential family to their way home. The first time in forty-four presidents? How can that be? Perhaps it's directly related to Laura Bush's preparation for this transition. I read she mobilized the residential staff toward this move last spring. They started moving boxes of personal things out of the White House and Camp David last summer. By today all that remained of their belongings were two small suitcases.

Regardless of why it's never been done before, I was happy to see it done today. It showed great respect in front of a nation who has not respected President George W. Bush. Whether or not his actions deem respect, his position does. I'm sad to admit too many of us have failed in that arena, especially over the last few years.

Much was said and speculated about Rick Warren's presence and prayer. I think he did a great job.

I was surprised how frequently President Obama mentioned God in his speech. Surprised and delighted.

I am praying for our new President. I am praying for our government and our nation. I hope you are doing the same.

Mama Loves, a condensed version

2009-01-20T07:01:00.001-05:00

Normally Tuesday mornings start with Mama Loves, an exercise in gratitude and positive perspective. This week, however, my planned post is postponed.

My laptop in on the fritz. Yes, I believe my beautiful Ruthie, whom I love and can’t live without, is dying. She has gone everywhere with me for two years and now, sadly, I think she’s worn out. Why does this affect Mama Loves? Well, all my stuff is on that laptop (my graphics, pictures, programs, writing stuff*) and I can’t access it until I can wake her up, so that puts me on The Man’s computer, a viable substitution, but just not the same.

The positive side of this situation? Hmmm … I’ll likely waste less time today. I may need to get a new laptop soon. That’s kind of cool … expensive, but cool. And I get to play around with the hubby’s computer fortress. Who knows what fun stuff I’ll find here in the frigid corner of this basement? I’ll probably get to play my guitar today! That’s definitely cool.

Mama loves challenges. Mama loves surprises. Mama loves that God is always in control.

* Don’t worry: I have backups of all my book proposals, manuscripts, outlines and notes. I just haven’t backed up my other stuff. Can you guess what I’ll work on as soon as Ruthie comes out of this coma?

Update on the move

2009-01-18T19:23:00.002-05:00

Hey! I'm so excited my move to wordpress is almost finished. You can actually visit there now by going to this address: www.inthedailies.wordpress.com.

You'll notice the site is a little different ... different colors, different menu, different pages ... but it's still just me. I've moved most of my posts over there, so you won't miss a thing! I'm still trying to figure out how to transfer a couple things like my bookshelf and community memberships. In the meantime, I'm thrilled to finally have an updated "Writing" page and a better "Contact" page over there. Also, I like the header showing the sites title and not my name. No one cares about me anyway; we're here to glorify God - right? I want to focus to be on Him, not me. I'm just a tool.

Anywho, you can find me here and there. I'll post identical stuff on both sites until the move is complete and my domain (www.TanyaDennisBooks.com) is transferred. Thanks for your patience!!

Comment me some love. Let me know what you think of the new design!

Fabulous

2009-01-17T14:24:00.000-05:00

I love that word. Taryn recently gave me a "Fabulous Award." (By the way, her blog is protected for privacy, so you may or may not get there through that link.) I've known Taryn since third grade. Is that twenty-five years? Oh, my. To avoid further dating myself, I'll simply say that I am very honored and humbled to receive this from such a wonderful person. I may have to step it up a bit to prove myself and this blog worthy.

As with most of these awards, this one comes with requirements. I don't like requirements. This one says I must "award 5 others and also list 5 addictions" I have. I'll comply with the addictions.

God. (I can't get enough of Him! I'm not talking about reading the Bible incessantly, though reading Scripture is a manifestation of this addiction, but simply discovering God in creation, in life situations, in my children ... all around me. I am addicted to finding Him in unexpected places.)
Relationships. (This includes God, Rick, my kids, my extended families and my friends. I shrivel without interaction with each and every one of these every single day.)
Reading.
Starbucks.
My computer. (I need it! For writing, email, research, games, social interaction, an adult vocabulary and more.)

Just for good keeping, I'll throw in an extra.

Williams-Sonoma. (I LOVE kitchen gadgets and am totally obsessed with cakelet pans lately. They're so cool!)

I know I'm supposed to tag others, but I'm not going to. My rebellious nature surfaces here.

In line with #5 (my addiction to the computer), I've recently joined twitter. (If you want to "follow" me, click here.) Probably not the best idea since I already spend too much time online. The good news: I've found a ton of super cool blogs! Well, that's kind of good news except that now I spend even more time online following all these people and reading all their great posts.

So, instead of passing on this award, I'm going to list some of my new favorite blogs. All of these I've visited before on different occassions, but lately I've realized how consistently they excel and how much I look forward to what they'll write next.

Enjoy!

Whether we like it or not

2009-01-16T10:44:00.003-05:00

It is officially cold.

Five years ago (while pregnant with Ellie) I started storing water bottles and snacks in the car, you know, to prevent dehydration and insatiable hunger attacks that can strike while in NYC traffic. This habit continues today. This morning I found all four of my water bottles completely frozen. My nut bar shattered like glass. Of course, that was after taking a hammer to it because I wouldn't dare inflict that punishment on my teeth.

Other signs of winter? Ellie finally stopped asking to wear sundresses and sandals to school and Zach has a new meaning for "aggrieve."

"Mama, what aggrieve is it outside?"

"Twelve degrees, baby."

Yes, after dropping Ellie off at school, doing some grocery shopping and driving home, it was still only "twelve aggrieves" outside. Can we say "BRRRRRRRR!!!" (Yes, I know there should be a question mark there, but don't you think the exclamations are more important?)

On a related winter note, do you remember the whether/weather rhyme? I tried teaching it to the kids this week, not an easy task since Ellie still suffers from a speech impediment. It sounded something like this:

"Wheffvuh duh whatevuh is cold,
wheffvuh duh wheffvuh is hot,
Whatevuh duh wheffvuh, we'll wheffvuh duh wheffvuh,
wheffvuh we like it oh not!"

Quite the tongue twister when you can't pronounce the "-th" sound. I'll have to see if I can get it on video for you. It's pretty entertaining.

Works (and doesn't) For Me Wednesday

2009-01-14T13:04:00.001-05:00

Don't you love tips? Works For Me Wednesday (hosted by Rocks in my Dryer) is a weekly carnival devoted to the fun little tricks and tips that make life easier, more organized or simply more fun. I seldom participate, but I love reading through all the entries. This week I actually have two tips to offer!

Stuck Votives: I adore candles. I use them all the time, almost on a daily basis. What do you do after you've burned through a votive? You're stuck with the little, round metal wick stand and residual wax around the base of your holder. How do you get it out?

Stick in the freezer. After an hour or so, take them out and turn them upside down. The leftover candle will pop right out. I'm sure there's some scientific explanation of how temperature causes molecules to condense or something like that. All I know is it works.

Too Much Salt: I learned this from a friend last week (who happened to be quoting Martha Stewart). If you add too much salt to a recipe, you can fix the problem by dropping in a piece of potato. The potato will absorb the excess salt. Problem solved! Once your recipe is back to a preferred taste, remove the salt-sponge potato and discard.

Now I want to hear from you. Anyone got tips on making kids move faster? We have not been on time to school since snow descended on our state. I've tried waking up earlier, bribery, coersion, faster breakfasts, packing bags the night before ... you name it! None of it works for me. This morning I even tried (idle) threats of "If you don't hurry, you'll have to go to school with no socks and shoes!" That didn't faze them either. I cannot get my children to move quickly in the mornings and I would LOVE to know what tips y'all have for me.

Mama Loves: "Coincidences"

2009-01-13T03:04:00.003-05:00

I've quoted this here before, and here it is again: "Coincidences happen when God chooses to remain anonymous."

Mama loves coincidences.

Like when you're struggling with something and find loads of encouragement on that subject on four different blogs on the same day. Or when an old friend calls right when you're remembering a wonderful time you shared together. Or when you "stumble" upon just the perfect verse for that moment. That's what happened for me this week. None of these are "coincidences." They're all details orchestrated by God. A God who orchestrates details like this is just awesome. I love it.

If you've followed this blog for long, you know Mama Loves intends to point out the positive even in less than ideal situations. Parenting is tough. It's a humbling journey and yet such an honor. It's exhausting and exhilarating at the same time. We work to help our kids reach the next milestone, but then mourn how quickly they grow.

I'm hardly qualified to give advice on anything, least of all parenting, but one nugget I eagerly share: Don't wish away your days. When I first had Ellie someone told me "The days are long, but the years are short." Rarely have I heard such a true statement. Yes, it's exhausting. Yes, we look forward to a rest, but that will come and this time, this wondrous, never to be replicated time, will be gone in the blink of an eye. Never, ever wish away your days.

Here is the verse I found. Rather, it found me.

"Teach us to number our days right,
that we may gain a heart of wisdom."
- Psalm 90:12 (NIV)

Some random thoughts

2009-01-12T15:21:00.008-05:00

Prepare for a random stream of consciousness. A lot of things have been floating through this brain of mine, but none cohesive enough to make a full blog post. This is my mental goulash.

What is the lifespan of appliances? Within the past week I've started fires in two appliances: the microwave and the toaster. The toaster I can't explain. It is ten years old, but I couldn't find a cause of the sparks, and it worked fine after the fire was put out. (Yes, I did use it after the fire.) The microwave, however, I understand. I attempted a cool new trick from my friend Karen who suggested putting store-bought frosting into the microwave then pouring it over cakes to get a fondant-like smoothness. I didn't exactly get all the foil off the top of the canister before nuking it, thus the sparks. A bit of frosting burnt, but that was easily remedied. I just scooped it out and continued with our project. I can't exactly scoop out the section of countertop now singed from the toaster.

How long do you think my kids will be obsessed with Christmas? When do the in-home pageants stop? Not that I mind, but the stories grow more bizarre with each passing day. Today the baby Jesus was played by Eve (from WALL-E). A very hiccup-y Ellie delivered the babe while a sunglasses-clad Zach ran around with ribbons shouting "I'll marry Jesus!" I also overheard a discussion about how babies don't have wheels and moms can't be shepherds.

Two people have tagged me on Facebook for a 25 Things meme. I'm supposed to make a list of twenty-five lesser-known facts about me. I can't think of any except my French fry OCD: I only eat the perfectly shaped ones. I can't eat a French fry with a pointed end. It needs to be rectangular with ninety-degree corners forming a perfect square on each end. Weird, I know. I also can't eat mushy or cold French fries. Friends tell me I exude quirks, so why can't I think of any?

Last Friday morning I met Angie Shaghaghi. She spoke at our MOMS group at church. She's very cool, and I would love to be her friend. I'm trying one of her recipes tonight. She made it for us on Friday. It was fabulous! I hope my version turns out just as well. I realized that morning that I have a TON of very cool kitchen gadgets like a mandolin, creme brulee torch, and immersion blender, but I don't have a food processor. Isn't that weird? (Hmmm ... maybe that could be one of my 25 things?) I also realized I don't use all my cool gadgets often enough. Maybe that's because I have to store much of it in the basement. Someday I'll have a huge gourmet kitchen and then y'all will be so impressed with my culinary expertise!

Ellie loves tea parties, but she doesn't like tea. Instead she just adds a ton of sugar to lukewarm water. This piggybacks well on my nutritional apathy of blueberry pancake days, doesn't it, Dale? *grin* For the record, I use the 80/20 diet. We eat healthy 80% of the time and refuse to feel guilty the other 20%.

Speaking of Ellie, she has recently decided that is her name. If you don't know me personally, you may not realize Ellie is not our daughter's given name. It's what we've called her since birth, but it's not her name. When she turned three, she insisted we call her by her "real" name. If we wanted to use her nickname (Ellie), we must preface it with the proper title of "Princess." Well, in a new development, she has embraced her nickname and, as of last week, even introduced herself as "Ellie." Interesting - huh?

Children will play nicely together and independently for hours if you ask them to clean their rooms. My kids have occupied themselves all day because of that one simple request. Their rooms aren't clean, but they're quiet and happy. And I'm okay with that.

Free Children's Books!

2009-01-11T10:53:00.003-05:00

We're doing another giveaway on my other site: Christian Children's Book Review. Check it out! Just by leaving a comment, you can get two excellent, excellent picture books.

Here's a direct link to the giveaway.

The deadline is January 14th, so hop on over there and enter.

It's a blueberry pancake day.

2009-01-08T09:02:00.004-05:00

They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day. I never understood that.

For years people have been forcing me to eat when I wake up. In the absence of others (my mom, mother-in-law or sister) who would make me breakfast, the omenous, but never identified "they" still guilted me into grabbing something before leaving the house. If I'm not hungry, why do I need to eat? If I already have energy, what's the point of stuffing more in my mouth?

This morning I woke early planning to post about how important eye glasses are. (Last night before bed I almost smeared Butt Paste all over my dry, cracked hands. It and my hand cream come in containers of identical size and shape, and both were resting on the same shelf in the bathroom.) I planned a loquacious recounting with pictures, but my camera is broken and, after spending 15 minutes trying to get my camera phone to work, I gave up.

Blog post abandoned, I now had plenty of time to make a nice big breakfast for my family. Blueberry pancakes reign as the favorite.

I think "they" are right! I won't talk about the nutritional or health benefits of breakfast. I'm sure someone out there will be happy to fill me in regardless of my apathy. But this is what I noticed: my whole day forms differently when we have blueberry pancakes. We sit together as a family. We take time to enjoy one another's company before starting the day's activities. We make sure we're rested and ready before we become active. The benefits continue throughout the day. The kids play nicely together. They're not as clingy or whiney as on other days. They don't ask for TV as much. And me? I'm more productive. Everything just seems better.

Now all this certainly does not hinge on blueberry pancakes. If only it were that easy! Rather, it's about finding center, remembering why I'm here and what I've been called to do. If I start my morning by being still, even for just a twenty minutes or so, I can evaluate the situation and prepare for the day.

Some mornings I jump on my computer and, before I know it and before I've showered, my interests have sprawled in fifty-six different directions, the kids are fighting over what to watch on TV, the house is a mess, I'm frustrated and irritable. On my deliberate days, my blueberry pancake days, time moves slowly. I get showered before the kids wake up. I have quiet time to reflect. I get the breakfast dishes done before 6pm. (I know, shock and awe.) On my deliberate days, I keep my priorities straight: God first, family second, personal ambition third.

I really like those days.

Mama Loves: Answered Prayers

2009-01-06T09:29:00.006-05:00

I am, oh, so tempted to write about how Mama loves the times she is not interrupted every 30 seconds, but this exercise is supposed to encourage positive thinking, not ranting. So, for the moment (or however long it takes me to get through this post), I'm going to try to forget that I started this blog entry three hours ago. I'm going to remember that I love my children more than anything and, while I do want to teach them patience and courtesy, it really is more important that I am available to them than that I -- well, now I don't even remember what I was trying to do. On with the show.

If you're new to In the Dailies or Mama Loves, you can get all the details HERE. In short, it's an exercise in gratitude and positive thinking with the purpose of glorifying God. Philippians 4:8-9 serve as the foundation. Feel free to join in! Just sign in with Mr. Linky and be sure to include a link from your post to mine. Thanks!

Mama loves answered prayer.

Our son has had eight double ear infections in his rather short life. He's also had some single ear infections, but I've lost count of all those. He's never had pink eye. Our daughter, being consistent with their polarized natures, has never had an ear infection, but has had pink eye at least once a year since birth.

Two days ago she started rubbing her eyes, saying they were itchy. At first I thought "allergies", but then I remembered we still have snow; it's thirty degrees outside. I watched and waited. By last night the symptoms were obvious. Her iris was slightly raised and outlined by pink. The whites of her eye was grainy and the yellow gunk formed in the corners. Ugh. I told her we would pray about it. "We know God can heal your eye and take this away if He wants to. But if He chooses not to take it away while you're sleeping, we'll have to go to the doctor and trust God to use the doctor to make you better." She wasn't happy about it, but prayed any way. This morning her eye was completely clear.

God doesn't usually answer prayers like that. At least not for me. I usually have long painful waiting periods of lessons in trust and patience before we get answers so obvious.

Lynn Mosher wrote recently about ebenezers, memorials of God's goodness. It's so easy to forget how often and how perfectly He answers our prayers, how He provides for us. I think of the Israelites. God parted the Red Sea, saved them from plagues, caused Jericho to collapse and yet it seemed they continually forgot these amazing things. He miraculously fed them in the desert, brought water forth from rocks and blessed beyond all other nations, yet they forgot. They whined and complained. I don't want to be like that.

My favorite answered prayers (of course):

Rick - my best friend; the husband I never thought I would have; my earthly protector, provider, sanity-preserver and one pretty sexy guy.

Ellie - After four years of infertility, God surprised us with her.

Zach - Another surprise immediately after the first!

My favorite answered prayers from 2008:

Zach outgrowing his allergies

Surviving the storm of Lehman's collapse

My family being reunited after 8 years apart

The healthy birth of two nephews and a cousin

Getting to attend GPCWC

New witnessing opportunities in our neighborhood

There is so much!! So much. I've only just started the list; my heart overflows with the goodness of our God. What's on your list of favorite answered prayers?

If you like this blog ...

2009-01-05T09:31:00.001-05:00

... take note: IT'S MOVING.

For a number of reasons, I've decided to switch servers. I'm currently using a web host (Crossmap) and Blogger. But I've learned I can maintain the whole thing for less (time, money, frustration, etc.) through Wordpress alone. I'm in the process of creating my site over there now and wanted to give y'all a "heads up!"

If you access this site through my domain (www.TanyaDennisBooks.com), this doesn't affect you. That will still be my address and you'll still happily find me there. You can skip to the next post and continue your day with jolly delight.

If, however, you get here through the blog address (www.inthedailies.blogspot.com), a Feedblitz email or other blog reader service, you may need to make some changes to ensure you don't miss any posts. You can:

Memorize my domain: www.TanyaDennisBooks.com and access the site that way instead.
Change the address on your readers (Google, Feedburner, etc.).
Wait until the new site is up, then subscribe through the links there.

Again, I'm not moving the site today! This is just a notice of things to come. My goal is to have everything moved over sometime next week. I'll keep you posted until the job is done.

THANKS a bunch!! Comment or email me if you have any questions, concerns, funny stories, ethereal advice ...

Flanderize Me

2009-01-03T04:23:00.001-05:00

I don't curse often. I won't say I never curse, because sometimes unsavory words do escape my lips, like when a child inadvertently elbows me in the bosom. Hard. Or when I accidentally drop something very heavy on my foot. Usually, though, I employ pretty tame language. My expletives consist of Christianized versions of other words, like "frickin'" or "Oh, crap!" Even so, I've been trying to cut down on my colorful speech. This has resulted in a Flanders-like vocabulary.

Recently I caught myself mid-syllable. "Oh, cra--cky dawn!" Cracky dawn? What the heck does that mean? I don't know, but my Flanderized brain thought it more appropriate in front my kids than the alternative.

When you think about it, though, is there really a difference between saying "Oh poop!" or ... well, the other word? They're used in the same context with the same tone. So what's the difference?

A friend from high school once told of a term paper her father wrote in college. Every other word was a curse. The point of his essay was that foul language serves no purpose and doesn't mean anything anyway.

I'm not suggesting we should all have R-rated language; I'm simply pontificating the value of Christianized substitutions. Even the nicer versions sound awful coming from the mouths of preschoolers (and you know they repeat everything we say). So we come up with nonsensical words, like "diddly."

Kids' TV characters have their favorite phrases, too. Zach immitates Thomas and Friends with a hearty "Oh, cinder and ashes!" Or, my favorite: "Bust my bumpers!"

Other favorite kid-friendly expletives? Poot-in-nanny. (That one came directly from my Granny. I've no idea what it means, but she would say it often, and now so do I.) Dudley (a Ned Flanders favorite). Good night. Good grief. Argh.

Yes, I'm beginning to sound a bit like Charlie Brown over here. Parenthood has launched yet another attack against my adult vocabulary and it's winning.

10 Years Ago Today ...

2009-01-02T05:28:00.005-05:00

Ten years later and I'm still amazed he chose me. In awe, I collect all the tiny details God orchestrated to bring us together. This is, as Plumb sings, a real life fairy tale.

Now for those of you rolling your eyes or sighing with hope, let me startle you out of it. Life is difficult, and marriage is no exception. Being married is not better than being single; it's just different. It's a choice. A daily choice.

Rick and I don't value anniversaries too much. His parents are forcing us to go out tonight, which is great, but if they hadn't initiated the babysitting, we would probably stay home and watch Arrested Development then fall asleep early. Anniversaries aren't a big deal to us because every day together is a choice we are priviledged to make. Every day is special; every day is an anniversary.

So here is my advice for you. Remember that the wedding is just one day. It's not meant to be the best day of your life, simply the beginning of all your best days. My wedding contained a blizzard (that prevented the caterer, the trumpet player and half our guests from making it), a fire (in my veil), a lost contact (close-up pictures show me with one green eye and one blue), a getaway vehicle that looked strangely like a snowplow and a honeymoon spent at the airport hotel. No one will ever forget our wedding, but it's not because it was perfect. It was far from a fairy tale wedding! But I loved it. I was (and still am) able to focus on the bigger picture: the marriage, not the wedding. That day was just the frosting, just the bonus of choosing to spend the rest of my life with this man.

Finally, in remembering that the wedding is just one day, work hard on your relationship the rest of the days. Don't get lazy in your marriage. Communicate. Keep your spouse's interest. Remind that person why you chose him (or her, if you're one of the few men who read this blog). Pray for your spouse and your marriage. Thank God every day that you get to wake up next to that person.

Sure, the wedding is important and anniversaries are significant, but they're nothing compared to the promises made. The marriage, the keeping of those promises, is infinitely more important than the date or the party that kicked it off.

"For wherever you go, I will go.
Wherever you live, I will live.
Your people will become my people,
and your God will become my God.
Wherever you die, I will die – and there I will be buried.
May the Lord punish me severely if I do not keep my promise!
Only death will be able to separate me from you!”
Ruth 1:16-17 (NET)

Beyond Expiration

2009-01-01T01:23:00.001-05:00

This week I cleaned out the fridge. Oh, yes, that all-time favorite of activities. I couldn't put it off any longer. We had been gone since before Christmas, and I needed some place to put the new groceries I bought that morning. Normally I do this horrendous task before going on vacation. That way I come home to sparkling shelves and less work. But a snowstorm blew in and forced us to leave earlier than planned. So this week I tackled a job that should have been tackled weeks ago.

Guess what I found. I found that I actually should have tackled it months ago. Apparently I've been spot-cleaning the fridge rather than doing a full-blown clean sweep. I found chocolate soy milk that expired in August. I found salad dressing that expired January of last year and some goat cheese that could rival a seventh grade science project.

You see, we don't normally consume those items. They're once in a while groceries purchase for special recipes or a rare treat. For months they rested peacefully next to the Mango Curry Marinade we tried last summer, agreed we didn't like, but still kept in the fridge in case we changed our minds.

As I removed these expired foods and scrubbed the sticky messes they left behind, I thought about other areas of life untended. What parts of my heart have been ignored long enough that they've festered into a nasty, gooey scene in need of some cleaning? This could apply to sins, but also to good things left untouched. What sins am I preserving while rationalizing their existence in my heart? Are there gifts I've ignored? Talents I've allowed to sit idle until they're no longer useful? Have God-given opportunities expired?

Oh, Lord, search me! Show me what I need to see that I may clean out the recesses of my heart. I want to please You. I want to shine for You. I want to use all of me for Your glory that I may taste the blessings You have in store for those who love You.

"But blessed is the man who trusts me, God,
the woman who sticks with God.
They're like trees replanted in Eden,
putting down roots near the rivers—
Never a worry through the hottest of summers,
never dropping a leaf,
Serene and calm through droughts,
bearing fresh fruit every season.

"The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful,
a puzzle that no one can figure out.
But I, God, search the heart
and examine the mind.
I get to the heart of the human.
I get to the root of things.
I treat them as they really are,
not as they pretend to be."
-- Jeremiah 17:7-10
(The Message)

December Ellie-isms and Zach Attacks

2008-12-31T05:19:00.001-05:00

Ellie, while holding an angel high over the Nativity, Thomas and other train friends: "Attention, engines and people! Behold, a savior has been born; He is Christ the Lord! Engines and people! Sing 'Glory to God in the highest!'"

Zach: "Wow, Mom, dogs REALLY like milk! Wait -- that's a cow."

Ellie: "Um, Mom? I was trying to listen to you read that book, but the Christmas tree is so big and beautiful, and it sticks up above the top of the book. So I decided to look at the tree instead of looking at the book. I hope you don't mind."

Zach: "Let's play Under Britches!"
Translation: "Let's play London Bridge."

Zach: "RUFFA-BUM-BUM!"
Zach repeatedly shouted this all month in a very manly voice (well, as manly as a three-year-old can). "Little Drummer Boy" is by far Zach's favorite Christmas song.

Zach: "Mom, what are you doing in here? You know this is Daddy's fix-it shop - right? I don't think he would want you in here, 'cause you don't know how to fix anything and you might get cut and I don't want to see your guts."

Ellie: "There's a bug in my room! C'mon, Mom."
Zach: "I got the scissors. Everyone got your sharp stuff? We'll cut that bug!"
Me: "Wait - what?"
Ellie: "Mom, you get a paper towel. Me and Zach got the scissors. Let's go, brave people! Let's go get that bug."
Zach: "Brave people to the rescue!"

Ellie: "I don't want to go home. I want to stay here 'cause this is vacation and I'm a vacation girl."

Zach: "It's aggrieved!"
He shouts this whenever he and Ellie agree on something.

Zach, upon seeing my new guitar: "Wait, Mom! Don't touch anything." Three minutes later he returned with his drum. "Are you ready to rock? Let's jam!"

Mama Loves: Baptisms

2008-12-30T04:18:00.002-05:00

When I first started Mama Loves, I told you you don't have to be a mama to participate. Today is proof of that. Today is also kind of a Sunday Morning Leftover a la Spaghettipie.

Mama loves baptisms.

It's not really the baptisms themselves, but the proclamation of salvation, the sharing of testimonies, the undeniable evidence of lives changed through the power of God's grace. I weep every time.

A few weeks ago our church hosted a baptismal service. Twelve people, from age thirteen to seventy, shared their diverse testimonies before our pastor dunked them. One girl asked Jesus into her heart when she was four and then dedicated her life to Him at church camp. Immediately after her came a former drug addict and club owner who asked God for salvation in a crack house. The contrast startled me, but I wasn't the only one who noticed it. This man, after sharing his testimony of how God drew him out of his addictions and toward a new life, reminded us that the grace that made it possible is the same grace that saved the young girl who preceeded him. He said:

"Understanding the truth of God doesn't lead to an encounter with God; it IS an encounter with God. All testimonies are the same."

As a young believer I wished for a more dynamic testimony. I wished I had made more mistakes before meeting God so that I could wow people with God's fathomless love, His limitless forgiveness. But what this gentleman said is so true! We may think some testimonies are simple or dull, they don't have enough drama, but every testimony is amazing. Every story of salvation is a miracle. They are our stories of passing from death to life. What could be more dynamic than that?

This is why I love baptisms. They remind me of the grace shown me and how that grace grows old and never runs dry. How awesome that God can reach so many different people in so many different ways! And to be able to share that publicly with others? My heart overflows.

If this is something you love too, you gotta check out Heidi's post on Faces. It made me ... well, weep. You know those happy cries Ellie talks about? I love it.

Your turn. What are you loving this week?

Relinquishing Control: Part Deux

2008-12-29T07:05:00.000-05:00

If you missed the first part of this struggle, click HERE to see my progress thus far. That post focused on Christmas decorating. Today is another kind of decorating, but with cookies. Observe.

My Christmas cookies:

And Ellie's Christmas cookies:

It was another day of me continually biting my tongue. I really want her to enjoy cooking - and she does! - but I also really like things the way I like them. Thank God He gives me the grace and wisdom to keep my mouth shut and just let her play. Watching her put pink and purple on Christmas cookies was tough for me. Then she pulled out the dragees which proceeded to roll all over the kitchen and hide in crevices yet to be discovered. The biting continued. My back even started to tense.

But then I looked at her face, how proud she was of those ugly little cookies ...

... and then I realized how she'd already eaten half of them anyway and wondered why in the world I cared.

Sometimes I get so focused on the details I risk missing out on the really important stuff. I'm glad this time I caught myself before missing out, another memory to be treasured.

The best Christmas gifts

2008-12-26T14:30:00.005-05:00

I did get a couple goats this year. That was super cool, but this ... well, this was the best gift ever: having my whole family together.

A Christmas Miracle

2008-12-22T20:08:00.002-05:00

Hey, all! I'm still around, just not around here. I've got a number of posts ready and waiting in my head, but I'm too busy celebrating a Christmas miracle to write them down. It's difficult to believe, but in less than twelve hours, all my siblings will be under the same roof. This is the first time in almost eight years!! Furthermore, this is the first time in ten years that we'll be together for Christmas. How cool is this?! I'm thrilled and therefore not blogging. I'll be back, hopefully sooner than later, but as always: family comes first and, no matter how much I treasure all you bloggy friends, real life is way more important. In the meantime, get ready for some great stories.

Mama Loves: Best Friends

2008-12-16T06:48:00.006-05:00

I've learned that many things about life are double-sided. The same things that drive me crazy are things I love, or causes of things I love. For example, I love that my husband is brilliant and assertive ... until those wonderful features are used against me, as in interior design. I love that Ellie observes everything and notices the tiniest details ... until that perceptivity makes me late or forces me to be more patient than I like. Today's Mama Loves is in the same boat as these.

Mama loves built-in best friends.

Ellie and Zach are just seventeen months apart. Friends who are now having children close together ask me how I did it, what system I used to keep track of an infant and toddler at the same time. I honestly answer "I don't know." I remember very, very little of Zach's first six months. It's all a sleepless blur of changing diapers, feeding mouths, ear infections and food allergies. It is really tough having kids this close together! I would never recommend it ... until they become best friends. That's where we are now.

As I write this my two hyperactive preschoolers are sound asleep in the same bed. They love each other so much! And I love seeing that. Zach admires Ellie and will do anything to make her laugh. Ellie adores Zach and will fight off an army to keep him safe, not that he can't fend for himself or won't attack her the second all is well, but the love is there. We have our moments (hours) of chaos when they're chasing each other, tackling each other, stealing from one another and all that typical sibling angst. But more often than not, they are very best friends. He plays princess Polly Pockets and she plays football. She joins him in demolishing block towers and he plays "sweetie" (their version of babydolls). Even pirates. It's beautiful and I love it.

If you've written about the good side of life recently, link up. Get all the details of this weekly habit of positive thinking HERE.

We Can't Let This Bank Fail

2008-12-15T15:02:00.005-05:00

A few of my recent posts have encouraged you to support causes around the world. From Africa's AIDS epidemic and starving orphans to freezing children in Tibet and exploited and women and children all over the globe, there are many who need assistance. I don't want this blog to turn into a fundraiser for one cause after another, but I do want to make you aware of the things that burden my heart and the opportunities we have to help. Some are closer than you might think, even as close as the house next door.

More than 35 million Americans, including 12 million children, either live with or are on the verge of hunger. - USDA, Household Food Security in the United States, 2006

The number of families coming to churches and food banks trying to get help to feed their families has increased approximately 20 percent. - National Anti-Hunger Organizations, 2008 Blueprint to End Hunger

In New Jersey alone, an estimated 250,000 new clients will be seeking sustenance this year from the state’s food banks. – “No Food on the table,” By Judy Peet, The Star-Ledger, Oct. 23, 2008

While I often tell people I'm from New York, I actually live in New Jersey. (Oh, I cried the day I had to tag my beautiful vehicle with those distinct plates, but that's another post for another day.) In the four years I've lived here, I have learned to love it. Now this state that has become my home is facing a hunger crisis, and we're not alone. Food banks across the nation are struggling to meet the needs of their clients.

At the Community FoodBank of New Jersey (CFBNJ), requests for food have gone up 30 percent, but donations are down by 25 percent. - CFBNJ

Warehouse shelves that are typically stocked with food are bare and supplies have gotten so low that, for the first time in its 25 year history, the food bank is developing a rationing mechanism. - CFBNJ

The falling economy has been tough on everyone. We've felt it in our pockets and our security; you may remember my husband's company went bankrupt just a few months ago forcing us to enter an already saturated job market. And there are few signs of things getting better. Neighbors are hungry. If you can help, please do.

Find your local food bank. See what you can do. Every little bit helps. When you're hungry, even the smallest morsels can seem like a feast. If you live in New Jersey, click here for anti-hunger charities listed by county. If you're not in Jersey, check your yellow pages, your church or even your grocery stores. Somebody somewhere will be happy to direct you.

"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'"
- Matthew 25:34-36 (NIV)

A couple memes

2008-12-11T08:24:00.005-05:00

Dale over at Pyretic Ponderings tagged me in a 6 Things meme. Since I'm all in a Christmas-y mood, I thought I'd also tackle Kellie's meme today. Here goes.

6 Things I Value:
Faith, Grace and Mercy (I'm counting them as one thing, the opposite sides of the same coin.), Forgiveness, Truth and Authenticity (again, two sides of the same coin), Family, Fellowship

6 Things I Support: (This wasn't in Dale's meme, but I'm adding it because the things I support stem from what I value, but they are not the same.)
Adoption, Missions, Bible Translation, Small Government, Stay-at-home Moms, Lifetime Discipleship

6 Things I Do Not Support:
Gay Marriage, Polygamy, Abortion, Full-day Kindergarten, Divorce, Busyness for the sake of looking or feeling important

6 People I Tag: Karen, Sarah, Lauralin, Kelly, Monica and You.

~~~~~~~~~~~

And now for something much lighter, a "Getting to Know You" meme about Christmas.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
Usually wrapping paper, but occasionally I'll find a really, really cute bag and have to use it. I have a bit of a wrapping paper fetish. I hit The Container Store the day after Christmas almost every year.

2. Real tree or Artificial?
I prefer real, but also have an artificial for practical reasons, like the years we're away from home for Christmas and don't want to leave a giant fire hazard in our empty house.

3. When do you put up the tree?
The first weekend of December.

4. When do you take the tree down?
January 6th: Three Kings Day

5. Do you like eggnog?
Yes. Love it.

6. Favorite gift received as a child?
I don't know ... just being with family was/is always my favorite part of Christmas. I don't really remember the gifts.

7. Hardest person to buy for?
My husband. No question.

8. Easiest person to buy for?
Myself...(Just kidding!) (Sort of)...The kids.

9. Do you have a nativity scene?
Yes! I have the Willow Tree set and I LOVE it!! Rick gave me different pieces for my birthday and Christmas the last couple years -- first the Nativity, then the creche, the shepherds and the wisemen. It's very classic, monochromatic and none of the characters have faces. I like that. Simply gorgeous!

10. Mail or email Christmas cards?
Christmas cards? What are those? Just kidding. I mail them, but sometimes they don't get out until January ... or June or July.

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
A giant Tazmanian devil mug that reads "It's my way or it's wrong." Yes, a lovely reminder of my controlling tendencies. It has since become my husband's favorite soup mug.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie?
Oh, this is tough 'cause most of my favorite movies are Christmas ones: The Sound of Music, The Family Man, Christmas Vacation ... all three of these are traditions in this house. We watch all of them at least three times each between Thanksgiving and Christmas Day.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas?
I've been getting better about this! This year I started in June. I found a great close-out sale and stocked up. With the exception of stocking stuffers, I was finished before the end of October. Normally, though, I start in mid-October getting pretty serious the week before Thanksgiving. It's not about being organized; it's about hating shopping and crowds that much.

14 . Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
Yes.

16. Lights on the tree?
Just like I prefer a real tree, I prefer white lights. However, our artificial tree is pre-lit with colored lights.

17. Favorite Christmas song?
O Holy Night.

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home?
Almost always. We alternate between my husband's family and my family, so the question is not whether we travel, but how far. Is it a day-trip or a week-long vacation?

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer?
Who's Santa? *wink* Um, let's see ... Donner, Prancer, Nixon, Vixen, Rudolph, Clarisse, Clinton? Okay, no.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
We do one gift on Christmas Eve. On Christmas morning we read Luke 2 and pray, then open the rest of the gifts.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year?
I love it all! I can't think of a single thing I don't like about Christmas.

23. Favorite ornament theme or color?
Red. My favorites are classic ornaments, shiny and bright, but we have an ecclectic collection of ornaments and decorations, some from my childhood, some our kids have made.

24. What do you want for Christmas this year?
I already told you about the livestock ... the only other thing I want is for my family to enjoy the holiday in all its wonder! This truly is the best time of the year, and I don't want us to rush through it only to realize we've missed the very best parts. Christmas is like parenting: you could miss it if you blink.

Relinquishing Control ... or at least some of it.

2008-12-10T12:49:00.008-05:00

Not long after I married Rick, one of his relatives ... (don't ask which one, 'cause honestly I don't remember -- I know y'all are reading this!) ... someone told me I was a control freak. Well, she probably didn't say it like that; I'm not sure the f-word is acceptable vocabulary, but she did say something to that effect, something like "this must be difficult for you since you need to be in control of everything."

At the time I was quite offended. Let me cringe while I admit I probably vented to a few people about the vast untruths of her assessment. However, I have learned over the past ten years that, while I may not be a certifiable control freak, I definitely struggle to relinquish control in certain areas.

With some things, I really couldn't care less how things are done. For example, vacations. I'm totally a go-with-the-flow kinda girl. Potluck dinners. Just tell me what to bring and you can decorate the church with nude hula girls if you want. I don't care. (I might ask to Sharpie over their coconuts, but other than that, it's your party.) Even my own wedding I didn't care too much about. I let other people pick the bridesmaid dresses, the photographer, the food, the invitations and the decorations. I picked the man, the cake and my dress. That was about it.

I am not so free and flexible when it comes to two big things: art supplies and Christmas decorations. (I know my wedding should be "bigger" than "art supplies", but for some reason ... I don't know.) I'll explain the art supplies some other time, how I shrink at the very thought of playdough and bite my tongue (hard!) everytime my kids jam a paintbrush into their paper thereby breaking all those precious bristles. *Deep cleansing breath.* For now, let me share about Christmas.

The kids wanted to help. And I wanted them to help! I want my kids to be involved and I want to enjoy having them involved. A friend recently emailed me about how she loves the way I engage my kids. I laughed because I knew this post was forthcoming. I do engage my kids! But it is sometimes with great personal restraint. Sometimes I go behind them and "fix" their creative endeavors. Sometimes I just take a deep breath and remind myself they're kids who are learning and growing at astronomical rates and one day I'll miss all these "imperfect" moments desperately.

I give you Exhibit A: The Wreath. Can you guess which one is Ellie's and which one is mine?

Actually, it's the same wreath. These are before and after pictures. Yup. Her creative expression lasted about five minutes before I "fixed" it to better reflect what I wanted.

Or how about these trees? Exhibit B: The Topiaries. They shank our front door. These are not before and after pictures; you're actually at two separate trees.

I left Ellie's (the one on the right) like this for two whole days. That was as long as I could go before "fixing" it.

Finally, I give you Exhibit C: The Tree. As you may have guessed from the previous evidence, I like my decorations orderly and spaced. They don't need to be perfect or symmetrical, but the negative space is very important to me. This is my part of our tree.

And this is the part the kids decorated. I took this picture before we added the candy canes, so just imagine a whole mess of those on here too. One poor branch is holding three ornaments and two candy canes.

Did you catch that? "One branch IS holding ..." Present tense! Yessiree, I'm making progress! The tree is still as it was the day the kids helped decorate it. Almost a full week later and I have not rearranged a single thing. Aren't you proud of me?

Now, all you math geniuses: If my tree is six feet tall, how tall are my children?

Mama Loves: Attitudes of Gratitude

2008-12-09T07:05:00.005-05:00

One of my very favorite parts of kids is what they teach me. God tells us to come to Him with a child-like faith. Without being around children, it's difficult to fully grasp what that entails. I'm not saying you need to be a parent to understand, just that observing children (as a teacher, an aunt, a parent, a friend) adds dimension. It puts flesh on an otherwise abstract concept.

This week Mama loves attitudes of gratitude.

Please note: this is a seasonal mama loves. It's not always present in this house, but when it is, it blows me away. For example, last night after baths, Zach thanked me for combing his hair. Kids (usually) take very little for granted! Ellie has been thrilled with all the hub-bub that goes with Christmas. She turns off all the lights to admire the twinkling tree. With a big sigh she thanks me and Daddy and Jesus for giving her Christmas. We may have to work on her doctrine a little bit, but I love her sheer joy at these little things most take for granted. And she's always the first to give an enthusiastic "thank you."

About a month ago I took the kids to McDonald's for lunch. Because of Zach's food allergies (which he outgrew over the summer PRAISE GOD!!) and other reasons (like lingering trauma from watching Supersize Me), we very rarely eat there. Ellie was estatic! She'd never seen anything quite like it. Immediately after finding some seats during the busy lunch rush, she hugged my neck and yelled out: "Thank you, Mommy!! Thank you for bringing us here! I LOVE it!" I'm sure you can imagine the funny looks I got from the other patrons. I mean, what American mother deprives her children of Ronald McDonald and French fries?? What kind of sheltered life am I giving them? But my heart melted. Simple things receive grand showers of thanksgiving.

What about you and me? What can we be grateful for today? How can we foster attitudes of gratitude?

For more info on Mama Loves, visit this post. If you want to participate, be sure to sign up with Mister Linky here.

Proximity Award

2008-12-08T16:42:00.001-05:00

My friend Lynn gave me a blog award! It's my first ever, and it's a great one. I am truly honored and humbled. If you've not been to Lynn's site, Heading Home, you should take a few minutes to visit. She's such a positive, encouraging writer. I love visiting her there and diving into her thoughts. If anyone is worthy of this award, it is she. However, since I can't give it back to her, I'll name a few people of my own whom I think deserving.

What is the proximity award? Well, in spite of the all-Spanish speaking birthday party I attended with Ellie last weekend (which is worthy of its own blog post), I've little confidence in translating. It was explained to me this way:

"This blog invests and believes in PROXIMITY - nearness in space, time and relationships! These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers! Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award."

Each of the following embody this perfectly. In no particular order ...

Kellie at La Vida Dolce : Kellie is fabulous! I've never actually met her ... now that I think about it, I've not met any of these people in person, but each has impacted me and my faith in unique ways. Kellie challenges me to be intentional with my faith and actions. Her Tru-isms Campaign over the summer forced me to disect my motivations and embrace what it really true. Even her seemingly mundane posts encourage authenticity and an everyday Christian life.
Heidi at Moms, Ministry and More : I've only been following Heidi for a few months and already she's made a strong impression. She does what I love best: she finds God in the details. Whether it's a gathering of koi or the words of children, she recognizes God in these dailies.
Kristen at We Are That Family : You may recognize this from the 'Fro Me to You Carnival I frequent on Thursdays. Kristen has taught me to embrace my imperfections and those of my family. Not to elevate them or take pride in them, but just to admit them and accept them -- then praise God for His amazing grace and mercy which consistently and perfectly make up for my shortcomings! I also love how, no matter how random or comical her posts, she always includes scripture at the bottom.
Monica at Paper Bridges : Monica is all about community. She draws people closer to God and each other, be it through challenging political posts, mothering posts, homeschooling posts or just funny things that happened. She's on NJ Mom Bloggers, Facebook, Twitter and a dozen other great community builders. She encourages me (and her other readers) to keep relationships first, with God and the others in your life.
Beverly at The High Calling : Beverly is the perfect mother. Seriously. I wish I were more like her. She is an excellent steward of time, faith, energies and resources. She exemplifies sacrificial love and patience. Have you heard of the excellent wife? The beautiful quiet spirit? Beverly puts flesh on these oft elusive aspirations.
Heather at L'Chaim : I've sent you to Heather's site a number of times. She writes about the intersection of faith, life and art. Her site consistently challenges me to find God in the "secular" parts of life: movies, artwork, literature and more.

I know I'm supposed to list eight blogs, but Lynn had more than eight deserving blog-friends, so it kind of evens out. I'd also like to highlight Deb at Greatest Mission Trip You'll Ever Take. She has already received and given the award, so I don't think I'm allowed to give it to her again just yet. Actually, including Lynn and Deb, I am listing eight blogs!

I hope you'll give each a visit. I'm positive you'll find value in each.

More gifts for the "hard-to-shop-for" people

2008-12-04T11:51:00.000-05:00

On Monday I talked about World Vision and how I would love to get a goat for Christmas. Today I want to mention a few more gift ideas for those people who seem to have everything or want nothing.

First, my friend Erica has a great list of sites on her blog. There are a number of gifts there, from handbags to jewelry, t-shirts and more. All of the links she provides and the organizations they represent benefit various causes: poverty, orphans, widows, slaves around the world and exploited girls. Her list is definitely worth a few minutes of your time. Here's a link.

OneVerse: Last year I highlighted this program. It's so cool! Today, nearly 200 million people representing over 2200 language groups are still waiting to hear God's message of hope in a language that they can understand best. Can you imagine not having a single verse of God's Word in your own language? For just $26 you can make a difference, one verse at a time. OneVerse is part of The Seed Company which is a sister organization of Wycliffe.

Samaritan's Purse: You're probably familiar with Samaritan's Purse. They have a number of wonderful programs including Operation Christmas Child. They're gift catalog includes blankets, food, livestock, fresh wells, education and sports gear, just like World Vision. But Samaritan's Purse also offers you the opportunity to be involved in providing aid in crisis areas hit by natural disasters, providing a flight for a child who desperately needs a medical procedure, or helping young doctors get to the mission fields. Here is a link to their gift catalog.

Why my husband is SO excited

2008-12-04T09:59:00.005-05:00

This post is brought to you by 'Fro Me to You, the weekly carnival of photos that will never see the inside of a fancy-schmancy scrapbook. Or any other scrapbook in my lifetime. For more fun pics and the stories that accompany them, visit We Are That Family. You gotta go today because Kristin has a beautiful story about her first Christmas with her husband. It's great.

Why is my husband so excited? My hair is growing. I know, I know! He said he loved the short hair after I got my long locks chopped, but it turns out that was code for "Baby, you're so gorgeous and sexy; you could do anything to your hair and still look good to me." He then clarified that he really does NOT like change and he really DOES prefer long hair. Hence, I'm not maintaining the look from my not-so-impulsive makeover.

It's been almost two months since the big cut, and already I can do fun things like this.

It's difficult to get a picture of the back of your head, especially when sporting an itty-bitty Pebble ponytail like this one.

And, on days I don't plan to leave the house and really want it out of my face, I do this.

Much more attractive, I know. And why, if I wasn't planning to leave the house, did I arm my 4-year-old with a camera?

The funny thing is that my husband thinks this is fantastic. Both the ponytail and the pigtails, he thinks they're wonderful. I don't get it. He doesn't like short hair, but he loves it when I pull my hair back. What's the point of having long hair if you always put it up? I don't see a big difference, but I'm told there is one. And I know a happy husband is infinitely more valuable than a short, sassy 'do.

While I'm definitely letting it grow, I may get the bangs cut again. I loved what the stylist did with them. And maybe I'll play with some color too. *grin*

Wordless Wednesday: My Little Pirates

2008-12-03T06:16:00.000-05:00

I can't decide if Zach looks more like a rapper or a cancer patient. Either way, they make pretty ferocious pirates. Oh, and Ellie's beard is pure chocolate. I know ... I don't do "wordless" well, but when have you ever known me to follow all the rules?

For more priceless photos check out 5 Minutes for Mom and their Wordless Wendesday Carnival.

Mama Loves: Battle of the Bands

2008-12-02T00:01:00.004-05:00

All right, last week I felt a little lonely. C'mon, people! You can't think of ANYTHING positive to blog about?? Not even on the week of Thanksgiving?! Hopefully this week we'll have a few brave souls who aren't afraid to publicize something they get excited about, something to shout praise for. Remember to link back here so I can read all about it. For full details on Mama Loves, CLICK HERE.

This week Mama loves ... battle of the bands.

Remember back in college when we would all hit coffee houses every weekend to hear the newest rage and swoon over the lead singer? Or the drummer. That was great. Like nearly every other aspect of my life, battle of the bands morphed into something entirely new when I became a mother. Grunge bands and Friday midnight cappuccinos reside in my past. In their place I get two preschoolers singing/shouting to see whose song is best.

Sunday morning on the way to church Ellie belted out "This is the Day" while Zach performed a rather militant version of "What a Mighty God We Serve." It was beautiful! I couldn't stop myself from smiling. I love how they love to sing praises. Granted, they hear worship songs a lot in this house, but they hear their fair share of Laurie Berkner, Toby Mac and Nina Simone, too. Ellie's favorite lullaby is a song by The Beatles and, for the first six months of his life, Zach was rarely tantrum-free unless Lauryn Hill played in the background. And yet, in spite of the eclectic exposure they receive, their battles always feature songs of praise. That's what I love. I don't care how loud they are, how off-key or miserably lacking in rhythm (unfortunately, all these traits are inherited from me) -- I love it. It's the best sound to fill my house and car.

Your turn! What's your favorite part of being a mom? Your favorite part of being alive? How can you practice Phil. 4:8-9 today?

Join me!!

2008-12-01T16:36:00.003-05:00

This is a reminder: tomorrow is Tuesday and that means Mama Loves. Join me in putting a positive grin on blogging. There has to be something you can praise God for this week! Visit this post for full details.

All I want for Christmas is a goat.

2008-12-01T10:39:00.002-05:00

And a cow. And maybe some chickens and a few farming tools.

We all have people on our lists who seem to have everything. And then there are those that, for whatever reason, are just plain difficult to shop for. Let me make some suggestions.

World Vision has this great program where you can be involved in helping communities throughout the world overcome poverty. These gifts help families overcome hunger in Africa, Asia, the Middle East, even the US. On their site, you'll find a whole gift catalog where you can purchase a couple chickens for just $25, five ducks for $30 or a fishing kit for $40. But that's neither the extent nor the intent.

"Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world." - James 1:27 (NASB)

Sure, this is an easy way to take care of those hard-to-shop-for people, but it's much more than that. This is a way to share the love of God with people who need to feel it. The world tells us Christmas is about getting gifts and making sure you receive exactly what you want to be comfortable and envied. God tells us a different story. Christmas is about being selfless. It's about a mimghty God becoming helpless and impotent in the form of an infant, all with the purpose of saving us from ourselves. He came as an insignificant child that we might live richly in a relationship with our Him, our Creator. God gave His Son. What can you give this year?

Through World Vision you can buy a share of a fish pond that can feed up to 50 people throughout the year. Or you could purchase a share of a milk cow that can offer much needed nutrition to those who desperately need it. You could fund the drilling of a well, the education for orphans or medical care for AIDS-infected children. All this can be done in honor of someone on your list, someone who really doesn't need a new tie or trinket to dust, someone who would be touched tremendously by your initiative to make a difference in their name. And for the name of Christ.

Take a minute to see how you can help by crossing someone off your list. Here's a link to the catalog. There you'll find a ton of great gifts along with statistics of how this opportunity can make a huge difference in peoples' lives.

I mentioned AIDS earlier. If you didn't know, today is World AIDS Day. World Vision has a lot on their site about this too. Click here to see that. The statistics are overwhelming. Think of Swaziland. Ten percent of the nation's population is children orphaned by AIDS. Ten percent! That number grows every day. You may think there's nothing you can do, but that's not true.

Starbucks is partnering with (RED) this holiday season. They are donating five cents from every drink purchase to (RED) and the AIDS campaign. Granted, it's only a few cents, but every bit helps. And I'm sure you can find a Starbucks somewhere near you, as well as an excuse to get there and buy ... oh, I don't know, four? seven drinks? That's my daily allotment.

Happy December, everyone!

November Ellie-isms and Zach Attacks

2008-11-30T08:28:00.001-05:00

Zach: "Ellie, I know a song so you won't be sad. (The following was sung to the tune of Jingle Bells.) Tinkerbell and Isabel. Tinker, tinker, Isabel. Isabel and Tinkerbell!!"

Ellie: "Oh, Zach! Thank you for singing me that song. It makes my heart SO happy!"

Zach: "Me and Mommy, me and Mommy and I pick you!" (Zach's version of "Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Moe.")

Ellie: "I don't think the boys will like how it smells in here. I think we should stop breathing when someone toots."

Zach: "Daddy said not to whine, so I'm going to go to sleep."

Ellie, after seeing Christmas decorations on street lamps: "MOM! We gotta talk to somebody. The whole town forgot about Thanksgiving!!"

Ellie: "I love this show. I just love it! It makes me want to cry a happy cry."

A Thanksgiving Psalm

2008-11-27T06:00:00.000-05:00

Shout out praises to the Lord, all the earth!
Worship the Lord with joy!
Enter his presence with joyful singing!

Acknowledge that the Lord is God!
He made us and we belong to him;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

Enter his gates with thanksgiving,
and his courts with praise!
Give him thanks!
Praise his name!

For the Lord is good.
His loyal love endures,
and he is faithful through all generations.

Psalms 100 (NET)

Works for Me Wednesday: Removing Wallpaper Adhesive

2008-11-26T15:42:00.000-05:00

Last week I asked (begged) for tips on removing wallpaper adhesive. Some of you commented, some emailed and some simply wished me good luck. Thank you, thank you for all the help!

Julie, a friend from my long ago working days, actually called her husband to help me find the best answer. We haven't seen each other in years and she's still one of my most helpful friends! So, Julie and Bruce, you get a special prize. Honorable mention goes to Erin and Kellie who both suggested I bribe friends to do it for me. Apparently the going rate is a case of beer and/or a lot of chocolate. Unfortunately, neither of these wonderful ladies live within 100 miles of me. Alas, I was left drinking and devouring chocolate all on my own. For the record, I consumed several vente white chocolate mochas and a couple mocha frapaccinos during the course of this project. Thank you, Starbucks!

And the winner is ... DIF!

Intended for stripping wallpaper, this stuff really works (as the slogan aptly states). You may remember my wallpaper came off without a hitch; it was that lovely vinyl stuff that peels in one piece without damaging the sheetrock. However, I was left with a ton of wallpaper adhesive. Hot water and elbow grease were doing the trick, but the process was far too labor intensive for a mom with two preschoolers. Enter DIF.

The instructions say to spray it on, wait 15-20 minutes then wash off with a damp sponge. I found these directions to be less than complete. Here's what worked for me.

Spray DIF gel on the walls. (If you buy the large "refill" bottle, you could actually roll it on with a paint roller. This might be great, but I stuck with spraying.)
Wait 15 minutes.
Using HOT water and a textured sponge, scrub the area. Some of the adhesive will come off immediately, but some won't. Scrub the whole area in a circular motion until the surface is evenly shiney and tacky to the touch.
Take a wallpaper scraper (a beveled razor blade with a long handle) and scrap the adhesive off the sheetrock. Be sure to do this at an angle; you don't want to damage your walls. I found using a diagonal direction works best.
Repeat steps 1-4 if necessary.
Once all the visible adhesive is removed, wipe down the walls with a soft sponge and hot water. This removes any residual adhesive.

That's it! It sounds like a lot of work, but trust me: this is the easy method!! It took me two and a half days to finish the dining room. Four years ago I did our living room, just slightly larger than the dining room, using hot water and vinegar. It took three weeks and that was with only one child, an infant who slept sixteen hours a day. Yup. This is much, much more effective and much faster.

Visit Rocks in my Dryer for more Works For Me Wednesday posts.

Mama Loves insatiable me.

2008-11-25T06:08:00.007-05:00

Welcome to the second week of Mama Loves! I've been offline for a few days engrossed in the always more important real life -- okay, "engaging" might be a bit too enthusiastic. More accurately, I've been working on that dining room project and, by the end of the day, am too tired to sit at the computer. All that aside, I'm hoping you'll participate in spite of my recent silence and late posting here.

For more information about Mama Loves, visit this post. Remember: you do NOT have to be a mama to participate!! Feel free to use this button to mark your post, though it's certainly not necessary. Don't forget to link back here in your post and to sign the widget below. Without further ado, here's what this mama loves.

Insatiable me. How's that for pride? Let me try again.

I love how my kids can never get enough of me.

Some days this really drives me crazy, like when I can't find privacy even in the shower. I've been known to lock my children in our warm, safe house while I sit freezing on the front porch just so I could have a few minutes of quiet, personal space. Yup, some days Mama does not love this, but most days I find it awesome and inspiring.

Why don't they get tired of me? Don't they see my many, many, many, many flaws? Why don't they need personal space?

I watched them love all over me all day and then cry when we must be apart. Ellie, especially, maintains an insatiable desire to be with me. Not just with me in the same house, but doing what I'm doing and being right there with me. She can't even eat dinner without touching me. Her little foot rubs against my leg all through the meal just so she can feel close to me. Sitting next to me is never enough. She wants to be on my lap, cheek to cheek with her frizzy curls tickling my nose and her spindly arms wrapped tightly around my neck.

One day in the not too distant future, I'll have a different story to tell. My kids will be sick of me and they'll prefer anyone's company to mine. But for now I relish this time when all they want is me. To them the world is perfectly right as long as I'm there holding them. This child-like faith amazes me.

Therein lies the root of my fascination. This isn't just an all-consuming adoration; it's a faith stronger than any I've ever seen. They believe with their entire beings that I, a flawed mortal, can fix anything from a shattered toy to a scraped knee to the hurt in their hearts. They trust me implicitly with their safety, provision, unconditional affection. Never do they doubt my ability to perfectly care for them. It's incredible!

And it's what God wants from His children. What would happen if we loved God with such abandon? What if we never doubted Him? That doesn't mean we can't ask Him questions or wonder about His methods, but what if we really, fully trusted Him? What if we could never get enough of Him and His Word? What if we didn't care about anything else as long as we're with Him? Now we know God is powerful and we know He can fix anything, but do we live like we know it? Are we holding those truths in our heads or in our hearts? He's immortal and void of imperfections; he's infinitely more deserving of our faith than I am of my children's faith and yet, too often, we hesitate. We hold back little pieces of our lives for ourselves, for us to control on our own. It's so silly.

So, there you go. I love how my kids love me and how they teach me to love God.

All right, it's your turn!

Looking for tips!

2008-11-20T09:36:00.004-05:00

Okay, people, today is the day to leave a comment. I am desperately seeking tips on removing wallpaper glue.

I abhor wallpaper. I'm not kidding. Well, let me qualify that: I abhor wallpaper in my house. More specifically, the work necessary to remove it. You can read all about my hatred and the reasons for it here and here. I also mentioned it here. Yup. It has become the bane of my existence since we bought this house from wallpaper-lovers. And now I'm in the middle of another lovely adventure with this despicable home "improvement" product.

Not long ago I mentioned our issues with Zach's room, the soon-to-be dining room. The wallpaper came off surprisingly well. Now I'm trying to get all the excess adhesive off. Got any tips? Ideas? Simply homemade tricks?? I'm all ears! I know how to get it off, but I'm looking for something a little quicker and more efficient than hot water and elbow grease.

One thing: my husband hates the smell of vinegar more than I hate wallpaper, so if your solution involves this wonder of wonders, please also include a way to get the smell out of the house before 6pm. Thanks!!

Mama Loves!

2008-11-18T00:01:00.002-05:00

Today is the kick-off of my Mama Loves Carnival! The point is simply to celebrate our blessings, to put a positive grin on blogging. It's far too easy to be negative, so Tuesdays are the days to talk about what we really love. If I were Julie Andrews, I would belt out a classic rendition of "My Favorite Things" but my singing voice certainly is not something well-loved. I'm going to try to stick with the theme here.

As I stated before, you do NOT have to be a mama to participate. You don't even need a uterus. All you have to do is blog about something positive. Be sure to include a link back here to In the Dailies and don't forget to sign up with Mr. Linky at the end of this post. Feel free to use my nifty button, if you like, but you certainly don't have to.

Now onto what this mama loves ...

Giggles. I can't get enough of them! I will do anything to get my kids to laugh, from public humiliation to personal injury, it's all worth it if I can get one of those uncontrollable giggles that seem to bubble out of them across several octaves. It's the most beautiful sound on the planet.

Lately the greatest source of giggles is bumps. Ellie and Zach run "the track" -- you know, the loop that connects the living room to the hallway to the kitchen and back to the living room -- in opposite directions just so they can bump into each other. They burst out in happy "sorry"s then a ripple of laughter that echoes through the house as they do it all over again, switching directions, of course. Last week we walked to the post office to mail a couple packages. Because it's a bit longer walk than they're used to, we took the double stroller. I huffed pushing about 90 pounds up and down the hills between here and the village, but didn't mind a bit. Every time we hit an uneven patch of sidewalk, my favorite sound filled the neighborhood. And when that sound is in stereo? Oh! That's what mama really loves.

Okay, your turn! What do you love about being a mama? What do you love about your job? Your husband? Your life? I want to hear it!

Don't forget!!

2008-11-17T10:14:00.002-05:00

Mama Loves starts tomorrow!! Click here for more details. Think about what's great and blog about it. My post goes up at 12:01 am. You can connect with Mr. Linky anytime after that. And invite others to participate as well!

Artuality: Expelled

2008-11-17T07:25:00.000-05:00

Last week we rented Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed. It's a documentary starring and written by Ben Stein. Initially I thought the movie was about the theory of intelligent design. This is definitely a major element, but the crux is actually about free speech. Because many in the scientific community have concluded that evolution is a fact, they dismiss and even ostracize any one who dares challenge the theory or any aspect of Darwinian thought. Stein's point is not about which position is correct or which has the most evidence; he simply wants to preserve freedom of speech and allow an open dialog of intelligent arguments. Proponents of intelligent design (which, by the way, is different from creationism) should not be punished simply because they see holes in the theory of evolution. Professionals should not be "black-listed" for disagreeing with popular opinion, especially in fields of education and higher learning.

Why am I sharing this with you?

Heather over at L'Chaim is hosting an Artuality carnival. The purpose is to discuss where art and spirituality collide. This month's theme is movies. What movies have inspired you creatively or challenged you spiritually? I've been thinking about her questions for over a week now. After renting this movie, I have much to say, much of which piggybacks on pontifications I had during this year's election.

In the past I've been annoyed by those who make politics all about one issue, especially if that issue is something never to be changed. Call me a pessimist, a pacifist, or simply apathetic. I mean to be none of these things. But I have struggled to understand why someone can think all of America's future revolves around abortion. Or gay rights. Or the environment. Yes, these are relevant, important issues, but does our nation's well-being truly rest on just one issue? Roe v. Wade will never be overturned. Roe is actually fighting toward that end herself, but even she, the one who initiated this, cannot turn the tide. It's done. So, why make such a huge stink over something that can't be changed? And why refuse to vote for someone who agrees with you on every issue but this one? Why make a losing cause your keystone? This movie answered some of these questions for me.

In Expelled Stein follows the repercussions of believing in evolution; he traces the theory to its conclusive worldview. This leads him to Hitler's Germany. The Third Reich's beliefs and behaviors were grounded in Darwinian thought. The concentration camps began as a means of cheap labor, but quickly became ways to eliminate the "less evolved" species. The Nazis did what they did in an effort to make humanity stronger. Anyone who voiced disagreements suffered the same end as the Jews, the invalids, and "un-evolved." But these are not the actions of a few insane dictators; these same Darwinian beliefs led to eugenics here in America. These actions were based on logical, intelligent conclusions based on erroneous thought. Germany didn't stumble into the Holocaust overnight; they slowly progressed there, one faulty conclusion after another, one silenced voice after another.

The movie makes a sobering point of what happens when free speech is stripped from the people. If we lose our freedom of speech, what's next? Our freedom of religion? Our property? Our rights to education? Our rights to raise our children in the manner we think best? Where does it end?

Once again, why am I telling you all this?

First of all, if you haven't seen the movie, you should. I want you to rent it and think about it and let me know what you think.

Secondly, this movie encouraged me to investigate ripples. Everything affects something else. We may never reverse Roe v. Wade, but if we stop fighting against it, what will happen? If murdering your child in utero is okay, then why not as an infant? If it's okay to terminate the life of a Down Syndrome fetus, then why not terminate the life of an adult with the same condition? Or an aging grandfather who has also become a burden? If gay marriage is legalized, what happens next? What happens when schools are required to teach my children that it's okay? And why would it be acceptable for homosexuals to marry, but polygamy is still illegal? Where do we draw the line? How far is too far and who decides?

God decides. And it's not okay for me to sit idly by. I'm not a spectator in this life. I restrained from writing about the election because I didn't want to "influence" anyone. But on November 4th, after reading Monica's election post, I was stunned by my silence. I don't want to influence anyone? Why not?? Jesus Christ did not shed His blood so that I could remain apathetic. He did not call us to make disciples in an "un-influential" way. Maybe I can't do much, but I can do something. Even if it's just signing a petition or placing a vote, maybe just writing on this blog is enough. But I must heed the ripples. I must investigate the consequences and stand up for what is right. I must be vocal about what God says is right.

So, what movies have impacted you spiritually? How? Be sure to check out Heather's site for more on movies and faith.

The not-so-spiritual side of my day.

2008-11-16T18:28:00.001-05:00

This morning I was basking in Scripture and the glory of God's presence. This evening I'm just trying to figure out how to fix my son's stanky breath. Let me explain.

I now know Zach loves onion rings. Before last night (Saturday) he had only had them when Burger King dropped one in our fries by mistake. Well, being the sweet mama that I am, I bought a bag from the grocery store and served them up with Corn Flake-Crusted Cod. Great recipe, by the way! Healthy, light, delicious and a definite favorite in this house. (Hmmm ... maybe I should have a spot for recipes somewhere on this site.) Anywho, I offered my own version of fish-n-chips to rave reviews from my groupies. And that was when I learned about Zach's passion for pungent food.

The Boy ate sixteen onion rings. At least that's how many I counted. He also ate some fish. By this morning the smell of onions oozed from his pores. His breath is nasty! I've brushed his teeth twice, given him a bath, changed his clothes, like, four times and forced him to eat TicTacs. Can you believe he still smells?! Oh, I love this kid, but he's going to suffocate me the next time laughs in my face or tries to tackle me with one of his infamous monkey hugs.

HELP!! Anyone got tips for killing a preschool boy's onion breath? I'm all ears.

Isaiah 55

2008-11-16T06:57:00.007-05:00

I've been reading through the Gospels. This morning a cross-reference in John 7 sent me to Isaiah 55. One verse in particular struck me, but the whole chapter is so awesome, I'm putting it all here for you to read. Check out these promises of mercy and blessing!

"Come, all you who are thirsty,
come to the waters;
and you who have no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without cost.

Why spend money on what is not bread,
and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.

Give ear and come to me;
hear me, that your soul may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you,
my faithful love promised to David.

See, I have made him a witness to the peoples,
a leader and commander of the peoples.

Surely you will summon nations you know not,
and nations that do not know you will hasten to you,
because of the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel,
for he has endowed you with splendor."

Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.

Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

"As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.

Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the LORD's renown,
for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed."

-- Isaiah 55 (NIV)

How cool is that? This passage contains so many wonderous truths, we could meditate on it for days. That said, I want to focus on the second verse, the one that really grabbed me by the ear.

Why spend money on what is not bread,
and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.

How often do we expel our resources on things that don't matter? Our time, our money, our thoughts, our energies ... are these devoted to bread, the Bread of Life? Or are we spending them on trivial matters? Eugene Peterson paraphrased this verse with a little more color (and a little more sugar). He asks: "Why do you spend all your hard-earned cash on cotton candy?" (The Message)

God is good for us. His Word brings us life! But too often we prefer the junk food to what is truly best for us. We're working hard to obtain that which will destroy us rather than that which will strengthen us and build us up to glory.

When we continue through the chapter, we learn His Word never comes back void. He promises that His Word will always, consistently, every single time benefit us. And He never breaks His promises. As a result even the mountains and trees will celebrate for us and the blessings we receive.

Announcements

2008-11-13T07:11:00.003-05:00

A couple announcements ...

Heidi posted a makeover! Jump over to her site (Moms, Ministry and More) to vote on her new 'do. Poor girl has been living for two years with a bad cut, just waiting for it to grow out. And now she's letting the bloggy world decide what she'll do next. After you vote, stick around on her site a bit. She has some super encouraging posts, some that will truly challenge your walk with Christ. It's a good stop.

Also, next Tuesday I'm starting a weekly carnival! I'm thinking I'll call it "Mama Loves", but I'm not completely decided. Comment me some ideas. You don't have to be a mama to participate!

The point of it is this: Take one post a week to celebrate the good. It's far too easy to think of the negative side of things. I'm a stay-at-home mom and many of you are, too. The isolation (common to writers as well, which many of you also are!) can drive one crazy. The constant demands, monotany with simultaneous unpredictability can leave us in a funk. But God has better plans for us! He wants us to rejoice and thrive in this high calling He has given us -- whether that calling be raising the next generation of missionaries, writing the next break-out novel or just finishing a mountain of laundry before your adoring husband comes home.

So, I'm setting up a way for us to focus on the praise-worthy parts of our life. What do you love about being a mama? What thrills you about being a writer? What's the best part of fulfilling your calling? We can all rant and rave and use our blogs for cathartic purposes, but let's offer one day a week (or at least one post!) for perpetual praise.

"Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies."
-- Philippians 4:8-9 (The Message)

So hop over to Heidi's site to vote on her hair, then come back for some positive thinking on Tuesday. I'll have Mr. Linky ready for whatever Mama Loves.

It's the little things.

2008-11-12T10:22:00.015-05:00

The little things can make an ordinary day red-letter. Yesterday was one of those days for me and my editorial OCD.

Ellie started taking ballet in September. Since then we have scheduled every Tuesday around this event. Every Tuesday that I forget to pack a picnic, we have lunch at the Subway in the shopping center that shares a parking lot with the dance school. And every Tuesday I have entered that Subway hoping against hope that the manager noticed and changed a misspelled sign.

Since September, maybe longer, this little sandwich shop has advertised "unsweatened" iced tea. Seeing some of the characters that work there, I'm sure some of the tea may be sweat-in, so it's nice of them to offer a no-sweat option.

I really wanted to tell someone, but the sandwich maker doesn't speak English well and I didn't want to seem critical or elitist. And every time I stepped toward the counter to make a stink about it, I thought of Lynn Truss, author of Eats, Shoots and Leaves. Armed with a giant apostrophe on a stick, she picketed the movie Two Weeks Notice. This drew more attention to her than to the punctuation error in the movie's title. I didn't want attention; I just wanted sweet instead of sweat.

Well, yesterday, finally, I saw a corrected sign. Hooray! Subway now sells unsweetened tea instead of unsweatened. I'm so happy! I didn't have my camera and my phone battery was dead, so ... I'll just give you a picture of Ellie at ballet.

Mirrors (or "Sunday's Leftovers")

2008-11-11T09:14:00.004-05:00

Each week Spaghettipie does a "Monday Morning Leftovers" post in which she recaps a tidbit of Sunday worship that continues to resonate the next day. This is kind of like that since these thoughts springboard from something our pastor spoke about this week.

For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror; for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was."
- James 1:23-24 (NASB)

What is the reason for a mirror? To see what we look like, of course, but why? So that we can see needs to be fixed and fix it, to evaluate what's not right and change accordingly.

Ellie loves her reflection. She is constantly looking at herself -- in mirrors, yes, but also in windows, TV screens, computer monitors, glass oven doors, even brass doorknobs! I am constantly asking her to look at me when we talk, but she's far more interested in watching her own reactions and facial expressions. Like most of us, she studies her face, her hair, her nails. She always wants to be sure everything is just the way she wants it.

Now, how absurd would it be for her to spend all that time memorizing her every feature to turn around and forget she has curly hair? Or to ask me what color her eyes are because she honestly doesn't know? It's ridiculous!

And yet that is exactly what we do when we go to church and read the Bible only to fail in obeying what we've learned.

Now that's all pretty standard stuff you've heard as long as you've been a believer. But think about this: the longer you go without looking in the mirror, the worse the problems get. Imagine if we only checked our appearance once a week. By Monday we'd have bed-head and morning breath. Tuesday will inspire the new Mach-17 razor. By Wednesday that piece of broccoli would seem permanently embedded in your gums and your coworkers might be asking for additional air fresheners. And your hair? Well, dreads might come back in fashion by Saturday. Come Sunday we'd have a lot of work to do.

How often do you look in the mirror of God's Word? We check ourselves out several times a day in bathroom mirrors, but how much time do we spend reading the Bible? We can all say we don't have time; we can all find reasons not to make time. But the longer go between looking, the bigger the problems become. Our selfishness snowballs into greed and covetous behavior while can catapult us into all kinds of despicable acts.

However, if we spend time each day evaluating who we are in Christ and what He requires of us, then our damage control is much more efficient. Instead of repelling others, we can attract them to the Truth.

Reason # 4713 why I Love Being a Mama

2008-11-10T10:13:00.003-05:00

Monkey hugs.

Zach is the best at these. At almost three and a half, he can still give the most cuddly, melt-in-your-arms hugs. He's never had the baby chub most kids do; he's tall and lean. He doesn't look squeezable, but he's an expert, an irrisistible bundle of affection -- when he wants to be. Sometimes treasures warrant their value by being rare. Oh, but I would revel in his hugs a hundred times a day, if he'd give them. Instead, he prefers the sneak attack. When I'm least expecting it, he'll jump up and wrap his arms, legs, neck and head as tightly as he can around me. I don't even have to hold on. He's my little chimpanzee, using his whole body and soul to show his love.

I wonder ... how different would my life be if I gave God monkey hugs? What would change if I wrapped my body and soul around His Word and His will? What if I offered uninhibited affection toward Him? Too often I reserve my praise for "safe" situations, like at home alone or only with other like-minded people. What if I didn't think about what others thought before shouting honor to God? Before thanking Him for His blessings? For answers to prayers I was afraid to speak? What if ...

As a sidenote, I don't actually keep an itemized list of all the reasons why I love being a mama, but that's not a bad idea! I always encourage new brides to keep a journal of the reasons she loves her man. On the honeymoon, it's easy to remember how he makes your heart flutter, but I guarantee there will be days that make you wonder why you married him. The journal is for those short-term memory days when you need a little help seeing the best part of your mate. Mamas definitely have short-term memory days too! Why did I decide to quit my job and stay home? What possessed me to have more than one? How much longer until bedtime? Oh, yeah, there are definitely days I need to remember why I love being a mama.

If you're a mama, what's your favorite part? If you're not, how do you give God monkey hugs?

21 Days

2008-11-08T13:44:00.000-05:00

In good old Indiana, where I was born and raised, drivers immediately pull over at first sight of an ambulance (or a police car, fire truck or funeral procession). But things are a little different in Jersey. Here the traditional response is to speed up and outrun the emergency vehicle or proceed as normal until they catch up to you. Then most people pull over a few inches, just enough to let the lights and sirens squeak by. Some, though, never move over. I think it's an attitude thing. If the guy really wanted to get to the hospital, he should have timed it better. I was here first. Besides, there are EMTs in the back of that thing; he'll be fine.

When I first moved here, I held tightly to my Midwest training, but soon encountered the ridicule of friends and insults from other drivers who didn't understand why I would inconvenience them and their schedules just because some poor fella needed medical attention. Before long, I too was complaining about being late. I would pull over several times a day for these noble reasons only to accosted by drivers who wouldn't let me back in traffic! (This is why those who do pull over only do so a few inches. If you pull all the way onto the shoulder, you could be stuck there for hours until a gracious citizen admits you back onto the road or a nearsighted grandma decides to stick to the speed limit.) The lesson learned, I've acclimated to East Coast driving standards.

This week when I noticed an ambulance in my rearview mirror, I kept driving. I watched and waited. I didn't want the kids to miss seeing the cool flashing lights. Eventually he caught up.

"Hey, kids! Look out Ellie's window. An ambulance is coming by! Isn't that neat?"

"Um, Mom? Shouldn't we pray for the people inside?"

Nothing corrects perspective quite like a child speaking truth.

When Ellie was much younger, before Zach could talk, I taught her to pray every time we saw an accident. I haven't done that in a long time. My mind has become cluttered with so many other things that I just haven't thought about it. I am more enthusiastic about showing my kids flashing lights and super cool construction trucks than I am showing compassion and living an exemplary life of prayer.

They say it takes twenty-one days to form a habit. Ellie got it down in much less. She has a beautiful habit of prayer, a wonderous habit of compassion. Those disciplines are more impulsive than habitual with me. Hopefully, though, her habits (learned from someone ...) can rub off on me (again).

Found while purging ('Fro Me to You)

2008-11-06T10:10:00.008-05:00

In a former lifetime I was an artist. A magnet school in Philly accepted me as a fine art major, specializing in drawing, painting and color theory. I even taught the subjects briefly at a boarding school in Switzerland.

But those days are long, long past. My portfolio and a random collection of works have collected dust in every home we've occupied. Well, we're running out of space, so last weekend I started another round of purging. Extra sheets, never-used towels and too-small clothes were all tossed into the "donate" pile. Then I bumped into my box of past-life treasures. There, tucked randomly in a box of charcoal sketches, I found this:

Can you find me? It's not terribly difficult considering there's only one blond female in the photo, but, for those who really can't tell, here's a close-up.

I can't remember exactly when this was taken, but I'm guessing around 1988. I think I was twelve or thirteen, but I really don't remember and, unfortunately, there's no date on the picture. But it had to be before fourteen. That was the age when I finally gave up the lovely Annie-like perm that was so popular back then.

Disregarding the date, here's what I know about the who and where. It was a family vacation with his, hers and ours. That's my dad. The little guy in front of me is my younger brother, Ted. (You may remember him from this post.) Sitting between me and my step-mom is my half-brother, Andrew. The rest (Melinda, Eric, and Kevin) were siblings I gained when Dad and Donna got married (and lost when they got divorced a few years later). We were in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. The first week of our vacation was spent on a houseboat on some big lake down there. That was fun. The rest of the time was spent camping between Dollywood and the Smoky Mountains of North Carolina.

We didn't realize until after the photo was framed and hanging in the family dining room that certain animosities may have surfaced. Take a gander at the aim. Yup. Ted's shooting Donna, Dad's shooting me, and both my step-brothers are gunnin' for my father. Huh. Well, at least we've got plenty of alcohol to tend the wounded and comfort the mourning.

For more blasts from the past or stories that make your family look like the Cleavers, check out We Are That Family and the 'Fro Me to You Carnival.

Thank my mother

2008-11-05T12:29:00.005-05:00

I want to say so many things about this year's presidential election -- about the campaigns, the candidates, the issues and the results -- but it would be unwise for me to say any of it without further prayer. Fortunately for you, my mother called this morning. That poor, dear woman listened to me rant and rave for over an hour. This was after I had very loudly and passionately chased my husband around the house forcing him to endure my opinions. He had to leave before my thoughts were exhausted, so Mom became my next caged audience. Oh, she loves me so! If you see her today, thank her. She did you a great service! While I'm still feeling quite passionate about this, the steam has dissipated. Maybe some day I'll share all of my thoughts, but right now only one thing seems important.

We must pray for President-Elect Barack Obama. Not just him, but we must pray fervently and consistently for all members of our government.

It doesn't matter if we voted for them or not. God has given these leaders their positions and we must petition the Lord to help them handle the responsibilities with wisdom and moral responsibility. I really don't think anyone truly knows what they're getting into when they run for office. Maybe they do. Regardless, the trials will be great and every President needs help. Let us stand with our leaders before our Lord.

"Our God, your name will be praised forever and forever. You are all-powerful, and you know everything. You control human events-- you give rulers their power and take it away, and you are the source of wisdom and knowledge. You explain deep mysteries, because even the dark is light to you."
-- Daniel 2:20-22 (CEV)

Go vote!!

2008-11-04T07:24:00.002-05:00

I'm sick and pretending I'm not. My day's plans include attempting to ignore a croaky throat, cotton-like mouth and impassible nasal passages and then going to vote.

Let me encourage you to get out there! Much is at stake with this election.

I'll not tell you whom to vote for, but I will ask you to handle your civic duties with sobriety. I've heard many (my own husband even) claim our votes don't count. Some believe the election is already decided. Others (like us) live in an area so thoroughly one-sided that, thanks to the electoral college, our votes will be counted, but will not given the right of impact. We can either vote with the majority or be drowned out by them. Some even joke that we should intentionally vote for the loser so we can claim it's not our fault when the country goes further downhill.

All of this thinking bothers me severely. The campaign is over, but the election is not. Polls mean nothing. They're "best guesses" and little more; they're a few people's opinions. But your vote, my vote, these mean something.

Get out there, rain, sleet, snow or 85 degree weather! Suffer through whatever you must. Voting is a privilege we Americans miserably take for granted. Yes, we have been granted this honor, so take advantage of it.

Ellie-isms & Zach Attacks for October

2008-10-31T09:56:00.006-04:00

Ellie: "Can you guys keep it down? I'm trying to rhyme over here."

Me, to Zach who was sitting on the toilet: "Did you go?"
Zach: "No."
Me: "Just a toot?"
Zach: "No. I wanted it to be real poopy, but it was just pretend."

Ellie: "I think we should go to a restaurant for lunch today."
Me: "What restaurant do you want to go to?"
Ellie: "The restaurant by the ballet studio."
Me: "Okay. Which one?"
Ellie: "THE ONE BY THE BALLET STUDIO! Are you deaf, Mom? Can you not hear me?"

Zach: "Mom! Mom! You gotta SEE this!! The couch is all fluffy and when I fluff it, it looks fluffy!!"

Ellie: "Mom! Mom! The man on the radio said there was a mix-up of snow and rain in New Jersey!! We're going to get snow!!!"
Me: "Well, it's only thirty-seven degrees here -- "
Zach: "I know what 'degrees' means. It means there's a mix-up with winter and we need to stir it with spoon."

Me: "What are you doing, honey?"
Ellie: "I'm just listening to you. I can't help myself from listening to you."

Oh, if only her "listening" actually meant "obeying" rather than "eavesdropping with the intent of sharing all that she hears."

Me: "Zach, do you need to go potty?"
Zach: (grunt.) "No."
Me: "You look like you need to go potty."
Zach: "But I just love it, Mommy! I love going poopy in my pants!!"

Me: "Honey, you're being very bossy today."
Ellie: "Yeah. It's 'cause I know everything."

Ellie: "Bears have hairy faces, but we don't. We have skinny faces."
Me: "That's right. Our faces are made of skin. What about bears' bellies? Who has a hairy belly?"
Ellie: "DADDY!!"

Ellie: "Mommy, you look so pretty. Just like a horse."

Now, these last two are frequently repeated. In fact, Ellie sings her song every morning on the way to school and most Sundays while driving to church.

Ellie's song, sung mostly to the tune of "Jingle Bells":
"Tinkerbell! Tinkerbell! Tinker all the way! Oh, what fun it is to ride in a Tinker-horsey sleigh. Hey! I love you (Here is where the tune goes astray.) always and forever because Tinkerbell I love you-hoo!!"

Zach, spoken at nearly every lull in any conversation: "And a DOO-DAH!!"
To this Ellie consistently replies: "What's a doo-dah? I have no idea what a doo-dah is!"
Zach then starts laughing hysterically and sings a song about silly doo-dahs.

And there you have it, folks. Your monthly glimpse into the soundtrack of my life. Isn't it beautiful?

PS: Happy birthday to Karen today!!

What you don't want to hear from the LIVING ROOM.

2008-10-30T11:42:00.002-04:00

I was working in the kitchen when I heard Isabel very calmly call me from the living room:

"Um ... Mommy? I think the potty's broken."

Snowballs

2008-10-29T16:53:00.001-04:00

We saw our first snowflakes today. The kids were SO excited!! Ellie wanted to run out and play immediately. Unfortunately, the short burst of seasonal quirkiness ended before we could find her mittens. That's okay by me. I'm not quite ready for winter yet. Especially if it, in traditional northeast fashion, decides to stick around through March. Besides, today I'm dealing with a completely different kind of snowball.

I mentioned last week about the leaky roof and new ceiling construction. Well, the guys finally finished the job yesterday. Shortly after they left, I got busy preparing the room to be repainted.

Three and a half years ago I decorated the room with trains. When finished, it looked like this.

Cute - right? I thought so. Perfect for Zach's first room, but not exactly suited for a dining room, which is what this room will soon become.

I started taking down the trains, 3-D wooden things I painted and nailed to the walls when Zach was born. The 12th piece brought with it a patch of wallpaper. You may remember the adventures we've had with wallpaper in this house. After finding one too many surprises, I decided to paint over the wallpaper in Zach's room rather than subject myself to another round of Homeowner's Roulette. But now, since the train pulled one tiny little piece, this simple cosmetic paint project snowballed into a much bigger job.

I started taking down the wallpaper to find holes. And the snowball grows. Fortunately these are much smaller than the ones we've encountered in the past. Then I found this.

Some days I really miss renting. Sure, we had a creepy landlord, but we didn't have snowballs. We didn't have the responsibility of caring if there were snowballs. We could make a phone call and forget it. As a homeowner, there is no one to call. Well, except our contractor who, I'm sure, loves having clients like us who buy houses like ours.

But then some snowballs are worth the effort.

"And not only that, but we also rejoice in our afflictions, because we know that affliction produces endurance, endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope." - Romans 5:3-4 (HCSB)

This is not hope as in a wish, but hope as in an utter, unrelenting confidence. In other words (my own words), trials encourage perseverance which, when it grows, snowballs into character which, the more it's tested, snowballs into an undoubtable faith in our salvation. That's a snowball I've love to manage.

How awesome would it be to never doubt your faith? To never think you're crazy for believing in a God you can't see or a direction you're not totally sure He's given you but you think He might have. These trials are a good thing when they snowball into an unshakable faith. But the only way they can do that is if we persevere. Our perseverance allows the trials to do their work, adding layer upon layer of character to us and our faith.

Sound off. What snowballs are you managing? Are you persevering? If not, what is preventing you from attaining that ultimate hope?

20/20

2008-10-28T14:20:00.002-04:00

New contacts day is nice, but it's nothing compared to new glasses day. I love getting new glasses! Perhaps it's my astigmatism or maybe a figment of my imagination, but I can see better with glasses than with contacts. When I get a new pair, it's like the world becomes bigger, brighter and better. Details I previously overlooked scream for my attention. Colors I considered drab are now so vivid they refused to be ignored. Is it possible to hear through your eyes? If so, the static clears. I can see. It's like life in HD.

Is there a way to get new glasses for your heart? Or relationships? What about life in general? I would love to apply this type of revelation to all aspects of existence. What if I could just buy a hat or something that enabled me to understand people's motives or to recognize why they behave the way they do? Simple headgear that would prevent me from making wrong assumptions and acting on wrong conclusions. Some goggles that would highlight the perfect path for my life, show me exactly what God wants me doing in this moment and time. Where can I buy those?

"Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known."
- 1 Corinthians 13:12 (NIV)

Oh, I look forward to that day!

Update on Mom

2008-10-25T06:15:00.004-04:00

Thank you for your prayers! I still hate being so far away, but I know God is taking care of her and He's FAR more capable than I am.

The surgery went well. They were able to complete it laparoscopically, which is the less invasive way. Hopefully this means a shorter, smoother recovery. They did keep her overnight because of her age, but everything seems to be fine. She's going home this morning and, so far, has little to no pain. Praise God!

Thanks, again, for your prayers, love and support! Stuff like this reduces me to a noodle. And a homesick little girl.

Pray for my mom

2008-10-24T12:10:00.003-04:00

Hey. My mom is undergoing surgery this afternoon. She's been in a ton of pain the past two weeks waiting for this day to arrive so she could have her gall bladder removed. Please pray for her and her doctors, that the operation would go well and that the recovery would be smooth. Pray also that I would trust God for this. I hate being so far from my mom, especially when she really could use some help. Unfortunately, 800 miles does not constitute a day trip. Thanks.

Growing up girly

2008-10-23T19:28:00.004-04:00

During our search as first-time homebuyers we discovered an unwritten New Jersey law: every house must have at least one pink room. When we purchased this house, it had two and a half pink rooms, a mild selection compared to our other choices. The bathroom has pink tile (Granted: a subdued pink, but pink nonetheless). It also had some paint-splattered pinkish wallpaper above the tile. Yum! One of the bedrooms had pink diagonally-striped wallpaper (this has since been eliminated), and the kitchen had pink countertops (also now eliminated).

I hate pink. Okay, maybe that's a little strong. I don't hate pink; I just really would prefer to limit its reach to my daughter's clothing and live flowers. Even within those realms, I like to keep pink minimal.

Lately our house has been in a bit of turmoil. The roof started leaking in Zach's room. Our contractor fixed it from the outside, but that turned out to be a temporary solution, so he had to go through the ceiling to really fix it. Before he could do that, we had to move Zach and all of his things upstairs. That's when the turmoil really started.

Ellie has the biggest room on the second floor. She's been in that room for three years, but as soon as Zach moved into the glorified closet across the hall, she grew discontent. She wanted the small room! We toyed with swapping, but she has more stuff than he does and switching would just be too much work. Cut through all the drama and tears to this week. We persuaded (bribed) Ellie to stay in the big room by offering to redecorate it. She confessed she wanted the small room so she could make it "girly."

Five years ago I spent a lot of time choosing the bedding for our firstborn. I wanted something feminine, but not too over-the-top girly. I did NOT want pink. I chose a lovely vintage floral quilt of delicious cranberry, sage and butter colors. Her crib converted to a full-size bed and, miraculously, I found the same floral fabric to make her a matching full-size quilt. When we moved here we painted the room a subtle cottage stone color (aka taupe). It was a beautiful room!

Now, after Ellie's makeover, it looks like this:

Yup. A Pepto Bismol explosion. I have no idea how I got such a girly girl! She really wants to paint the walls, too, but I just don't think I could handle that. The pink curtains already make the walls glow a little too pink for me. I also stopped shy of the "fairy canopy" she wanted suspended over her bed. As it is, the pink quilt, shams, pillowcases and curtains are added to the other confectionary items already cluttering her room. Like this.

And this.

And this. (Notice: even her polar bear is wearing a pink fairy dress.)

Oh, and this, which appears larger than actual size.

And here is her most favored possession, since it contains a bundle of pink jewelry. (Notice again, the fairy princess theme.)

But then she took the pink a bit too far.

The sacrifices parents make. I may *gulp* have a pink room in my house for the next five to fifteen years. *Deep breath* But look at that smile. It's worth every color-cringing moment.

For more non-scrapbook worthy blog posts, visit We Are That Family and 'Fro Me to You Carnival.

Solomon Summaries

2008-10-21T09:00:00.002-04:00

Just last week I was looking for a book to cover a rather specific topic. I found one that, according to the description offered, was exactly what I wanted. I ordered it and waited eagerly for its arrival. After reading the first chapter I discovered this book wasn't at all what I needed. I invested time and money into something I really didn't want and now I'll have to invest more time and money to find what I thought I had already found. I hate that!

This is why I am SO EXCITED about Solomon Summaries. A brand new service by husband and wife team, Chris and Heather Goodman, Solomon Summaries is something like Cliffs Notes for Christian books. You've seen my stacks of books. If you're anything like me, with more books to read than time to read them, you'll love this service.

Here's how it works.

They read the books then write an an 8-10 page summary.
They email you when new summaries are available (one each week = 52 books a year).
You log onto their website whenever is most convenient for you and read, print or listen to of the books that interest you.
If you want to read more, you can order the book directly through their site.

That's it. Pretty cool - huh? It's like a screening process done by your own personal assistant. No more buying the wrong book or investing more time than necessary into reading the wrong stuff. No more reading extra fluff when all you really want are the key points.

Now here's the really good news:

You can try it FREE between now and December 1st! Also, you will be entered into a drawing for a stack of books with your subscription, all because you heard about it from me through this blog tour. Just make sure you give them my name in the "how did you hear about us" section.

Want to see a sample summary? Here's one for Mere Christianity by C. S. Lewis and here's one for The 10 Commandments of Marriage by Ed Young.

Want to learn more? Check out the website at www.solomonsummaries.com.

Want to hear what other people think about it? Check out some of the other stops on this blog tour!
AKA Lewis Theodore
A Peek at My Bookshelf
A Prisoner of Hope
Aspire 2 Blog
Bible Dude
Blame it on the Loud Mouth Gene
Fictionary
Gatorskunkz and Mudcats
Geaux 2 Girl
High Calling Blogs
In.A.Mirror.Dimly
In the Dailies
Leap of Faith
Michelle Pendergrass
Morning Cup of Coffee
One Glory
Portrait of a Writer . . . Interrupted
Relevant Blog
So You Wanna Be Published
The View From Here

To participate in future blog tours, visit The Blog Tour Spot to see what's upcoming.

Resonant Chamber

2008-10-20T11:38:00.001-04:00

This is so super cool.

Isn't that awesome? If you want to watch it again (I've watched it, like, twelve times!), go HERE instead. It takes much longer to load than youtube (about 4 full minutes), but the quality is FAR superior.

Finger Puppet Theater!

2008-10-20T09:29:00.004-04:00

One of my first writing projects was "100 Days with 2 Toddlers and No TV." I started the manuscript after realizing that my hatred of cold temperatures would force me and my two cherubs to stay in the house through four months of winter every year for as long as we lived in the Northeast. Turns out there are literally hundreds of books inspiring parents to spend creative quality time with their kids, so my book never made it to print. In fact, I never got past a detailed chapter outline. Maybe someday. In the meantime, you, my precious blog readers, will be subject to all my splendid parental epiphanies. Here's my most recent: Finger Puppet Theatre.

The kids found some finger puppets at the bookstore. They were only forty-nine cents a piece, so for less than $5, I bought a mini Noah's Ark: two lions, two tigers, two giraffes and two zebras.

That same day we received a lovely package from Grandma. No one really cared about the contents (Sorry, Mom!), but we all loved the box. And that was when I had my apostrophe, when lightning struck my brain! (I'll give you 100 points if you can name that quote.) In short order we turned a boring cardboard box into this:

Just markers, scissors, some packaging tape (to stabilize), scraps of fabric and hot glue (to adhere the fabric -- keep away from the kids!!) ... My two have been playing with this for four days straight! They even pulled out a flashlight to serve as a spotlight during shows. It's fantastic. The kids have had so much fun.

Here's my girl helping decorate the stage. (This was on Wednesday, long before she got sick.)

"The Boy" found more interest in his snack (notice the Cheetos residue around his mouth) and being goofy.

Once the theater was finished, the shows began!
Ellie's shows, for some bazaar reason, always involve death. This has been a fascination of hers since Easter. I told Spaghettipie the other day how Ellie used to think everyone who died did so on a cross: Great-Grandma D., Great-Granny, my old dog ... But finger puppets, seemingly, always die from eating snails in the grass. My favorite story of hers was performed on Saturday night:

"Once upon a time there was wee little tiger who was a little bit dead. The end."

LOL! It still cracks me up!

Zach, always one to be unique, chose to hold all of his shows behind the curtains. We couldn't see anything! This shot shows me peeking through to disturb the backstage drama. He promptly shut the curtain in my face before continuing his play. I told you before about how Zach Stories always have aggressive crocodiles. Interestingly, when he has puppets on his fingers, all the stories are about loving mommies and their babies. I think I should get more puppets.

The other day a friend and I were talking about how much time we actually spend playing with our kids. Our experiences were very different. Her kids don't really expect her to do that while mine never get enough of it! Her next comment stuck with me: "They must think you're one of them." Now, my kids know I'm their mom. They know their daddy and I are the authorities; we're the ones in charge. But they also see us get down on the floor with them. They see me put on silly costumes and funny voices and run around like one of them.

It makes me think of 1 Corinthians 9. Paul talked about became like those whom he wanted to reach with the Gospel. I don't want my kids to see me as their peer, but more than anything I want to show them Christ's love. If spending a day making a simple puppet theater will do that, I'll do it every day. If my being child-like helps them to become Christ-like, then I gladly accept the challenge. May God be glorified through our play.

"To the weak I became weak, that I might win the weak; I have become all things to all men, that I may by all means save some. And I do all things for the sake of the gospel, that I may become a fellow partaker of it."
-- I Corinthians 9:22-23 (NASB)

Sick Love

2008-10-19T20:19:00.004-04:00

If you want to witness love personified, watch a mother with her sick child.

Often times I doubt my ability to be a good mom. I make mistakes every single day. But then there are days when I watch myself as if through a glass ceiling. Call it an "out of body experience" or whatever, but it's like I'm seeing myself and wondering how I do it. I know it's not me; it's Christ working through me and it's amazing. Tonight was one of those times.

Ellie's sick. At first I thought she was faking it just to get out of eating dinner. (It can be worse than pulling teeth to get this girl to eat sometimes.) We let her lay down on the couch while we ate, fully expecting her to ask for ice cream once the plates were cleaned up. But no. She lay whimpering in a ball, running a fever with chills. I felt awful for doubting her. By the end of the night, the couch slipcovers were in the washer and I was plucking pieces of vomit from her hair as she fell back to sleep.

I abhor that smell. I've washed my hands a dozen times, and that smell is still clinging to my skin. Under any other circumstances I would be totally disgusted. And yet, through that ceiling, I saw the most patient mom tonight. Where did she come from? She didn't raise her voice or even sigh at the inconvenience. She didn't complain about being tired or having no time to herself; she simply hugged her daughter and convinced her everything would be all right. She prayed instead of grumbled and didn't think twice about the extra load of laundry she had to do.

I wish I saw that mom more often.

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
"Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

-- 1 Corinthians 13

Finding a red light

2008-10-16T09:55:00.006-04:00

A familiar sound echoed across our hardwood floors: a hurried pitter-patter followed by the distinct clink of a toilet lid. I listened. Silence. That's never a good sign. I ran to the bathroom to find everything right - the child in the right room, the potty seat in place, the lid raised, the shower curtain still closed - except my son who was frozen solid and peeing freely on the floor. I pulled down his pants and tried to seat him, but Zach was too upset.

"Buddy, can you stop peeing?" The answer was obvious as the stream continued to arc in every direction but the still waters of the porcelain throne. I tried to stand my guy in front of the urinal (which, by the way, has found a permanent home in the bathroom rather than the living room. HGTV never featured my trend!), but it was too late.

”There’s no more pee-pee, Mommy.” Dejected and frustrated, he surrendered defeat.

”It’s okay, honey. We’ll just try to get to the bathroom sooner next time.”

My heart broke for the little guy. He was trying so hard, but he just couldn't stop. How do I teach that?

The better question is: how do I learn that?

Whenever I get in "the zone," I can't stop. I may physically stop, but my mind is still going full speed ahead in whatever direction that may be. Yes, I am physically with my kids and I'm trying to be there mentally as well, but where am I really? I'm thinking about all the housework that needs to be done or mentally listing the people I need to call. I look like I'm sipping Earl Grey, but truly I'm writing. I'm trying to catalog the edits I need to make or memorize the perfect word for that troublesome paragraph, which unfortunately only pops into my head between the first and second courses of a princess tea party.

And I'm a terrible actress. Either that or my kids are mind-readers. They know when I'm not "present." Ellie has banned books from her tea parties. She and Zach both have built a sort of sibling rivalry with Ruthie, my laptop. Okay, so maybe I shouldn't have named my computer, but she tends to go with me wherever I go and it just seemed like an appropriate name for her. They know when I'm zoning and they like it just as much as I do urine on the floor.

So, here's the question: how do I stop? I want to be with my kids and I want them to know I'm there, but sometimes my brain simply refuses to engage in playing. No offense to dolls and trains, but it's hard for a thirty-something mama to get into those games sometimes. Any suggestions?

Photo by Vicky Herrala.

A call to pray

2008-10-14T15:30:00.001-04:00

Once again I'm overwhelmed by the need to pray. So many people are hurting! Marriages are falling apart; friends who desperately want to have children continue to suffer miscarriages, or can't conceive at all. Other friends don't understand the treasures they have and contemplate throwing it all away through abortion. Neighbors don't know Christ and are not yet ready to hear. There are health issues, job issues, financial issues, relationship issues and none of this even touches what's happening around the world. This is all just in my little circle of friends and family. Outside that circle the reasons to pray multiply exponentialy. Millions of people are lost and haven't a clue where to find salvation; some don't even know where to find food. People are dying of disease, starvation, lonliness, genocide ... Who can help them? Who will defend them?

I am ashamed of myself. Last week I told you about the journey our church is taking of fasting and feasting. I've been fasting, but forgetting to attend the feast. Sure, I'm not wasting time on TV reruns or playing mind-numbing games on Facebook; I'm not spending all that time socializing. But I'm not spending the found time with God. I've cleaned my house and read some new books. I've even done a little papercrafting. I've hung new curtains and planned ways to reorganize furniture. I'm caught up on laundry. All of these are fine things to do, but none of it helps me know God, does it? None of it draws me closer to His heart. And here I am staring at an enormous mountain of needs. I am overwhelmed and ashamed at my pathetic waste of time.

Oh, Lord, have mercy on me! Just like Isaiah I cry "Woe is me!" and then just as quickly ask God to use me. I may not be able to do anything. I can't rescue orphans in Tanzania or feed the starving in Ethiopia; I can't save marriages or make wombs fruitful, but I can pray. Prayer, even though it seems minimal and certainly inactive, is often the very best thing to do.

Here am I, Lord! Send me, use me, change me. Open my eyes that I may see what I can do and then motivate my hands and feet to obey. Until then, make me steadfast in prayer for those whose feet are already on the move and those to whom You have sent them.

2008-10-13T10:13:00.005-04:00

We had a GREAT time at the concert on Friday! If you or your kids aren't hooked on Go Fish yet, give 'em a try!

My favorite CD is "Superstar." However, their newest album, which I've not yet heard in its entirety, is called "Party Like a Preschooler" and comes out within the next couple weeks.

I stocked up at the concert. Christmas gifts, people! And they just might turn into great witnessing tools for the kids' friends and their families. You never know what God might do through "little" somethings.

Guess who we're seeing tonight!

2008-10-10T14:31:00.003-04:00

Ellie woke each morning this week with the same question: "Is it Friday yet??" Well, today is Friday and that means ... we have Go Fish is in concert tonight!! Woo-hoo! The kids have been waiting for this all year. The event was only slightly eclipsed by Grandparents Day at school this morning. But, after a grand time showing off her classroom, teachers and crafts, they're now on their way home and the house is bursting with Fishy anticipation. Thought I should share a taste with you. Enjoy.

Just a blurb

2008-10-07T17:43:00.005-04:00

Today's post will be short. Here's a blurb from yesterday's reading in A Call to Die.

Be receptive. When He speaks, be still. Listen. It's not necessarily audible. It's even louder. It is straight to the heart. God doesn't need your ears to get your attention.

I love the idea of God's voice being louder than we can hear.

A Call to Die

2008-10-06T12:47:00.008-04:00

Yesterday our church started a corporate journey, forty days of "fasting from the world and feasting on God." This is the book we're using: A Call to Die by David Nasser. I invite you to join us. I won't be writing about it each day, but I'm sure some of it may seep into this blog. It might be nice to go through this together.

Today is Day 2 and I'm already struggling. Here's the deal. For this forty-day-period, we're supposed to fast from something, kind of like Lent. My problem is I can't think of what to fast from.

I can't cut out the internet or email because, well, it's just impractical. It's the only way I communicate with too many of my friends and family.

I could cut out TV, but I don't want to punish the whole family with a sacrifice I intend only for myself. Besides, I have waited MONTHS for The Office to come back. I know, I know - fasting should be wholehearted, but it's really our date night. Rick and I look forward to our time together in front of the tube all week. We can't afford a babysitter every week, so Thursday TV must be upheld in order to maintain a good healthy marriage. Such is my reasoning anyway.

I've considered cutting the phone, makeup (which I don't wear everyday anyway), books and extended hot showers. My problem is I can think of reasons why I need all of these things! As a mom, I am sacrificing myself every single day for hours at a time. I don't know which of these little, trivial luxuries of mine I could honestly live without and still maintain sanity. Granted, I lived without makeup and hot showers in Bosnia, but that was before I had kids, before I had two little beings completely dependant upon me for everything.

Before I get any more letters about my negative attitude toward motherhood, I AM NOT COMPLAINING ABOUT BEING A MOM!! I LOVE being a mother; I love my children more than life itself and I would do anything for them. But I also know that when I have a few little luxuries for myself --- some time to write, an extra long shower, a half hour of TV once a week --- when I have these tiny moments of revitalization, I am a better mom. If I don't get them, I become resentful and bitter. I hate being a bitter mom. And I'm not the only one who feels this way. Just today I spoke with two separate women who were really excited about an upcoming day when their husbands and kids were going away. They couldn't wait! Both were planning, through sparkling eyes, how they would spend their time of solitude.

So, what do I do? Do I risk becoming grumpy and resentful for the sake of a self-imposed challenge? Do I trust God to somehow change the pattern I've learned is consistent? Or do I just skip this part of the journey?

The book recommends we fast "from certain everyday things that occupy your time, so that it clears you to feast on God." What takes up so much of my time that I can't worship God more completely? I've got it! LAUNDRY!! No, wait, cleaning the house. Dishes? It's perfect! If I get a maid for the next forty days, I'll be a happy mother, a contented wife, and a servant wonderfully free to be gluttonous over God.

What's on my nightstand ... er, floor

2008-10-03T08:38:00.000-04:00

I called my mom the other day to tell her I saw the final Baxter book at the library. Amazon told me it wouldn't be released until the end of October, so I was shocked and knew she would be excited. She burst my bubble by telling me she had already purchased and read it and, oh! was I going to love it. Unfortunately, as I stood in my bedroom next to these piles of books (representative of many, many more piles throughout my house), I told her I can't buy any more books. Yup. I'm placing myself on a book-buying freeze. Hopefully this time I'll still to it.

I know you can't see all the titles in this picture (some of which I've already finished reading, some of which I've not yet opened). You can read reviews of some over at my Bookshelf, but for now I'll just fill you in a bit of what's helping me maintain an adult vocabulary. My reading habits break out into basic categories.

PARENTING BOOKS: I mentioned one earlier this week, but there are several. I usually grab a chapter at a time from a handful of books until I finish them or find a more urgent need to address. Right now I'm focusing on the balance aspect of parenting: how to keep everything in perspective and parent with purpose, how to make my days with these kids extremely intentional rather that just a season of survival. This includes Chasing God and the Kids, Too! and The Mission of Motherhood.

WRITING BOOKS: My favorite right now is On Writing Well by William Zinsser. It's fantastic. Of course, I've also got a couple writers market guides and, if I ever find time to read it, I'll grab that copy of Time to Write.

BIBLE STUDY: Last spring I led a study of Esther; this year I'm leading our moms group through Ruth. Some of the resources pictured are fictionalized accounts of these Biblical characters like The Road Home, Ebony Moon and Unshaken. Others are nonfiction studies like books by Sandra Glahn and Chuck Swindoll. And then there are the books I'm reading just for my personal growth, like No Other Gods and Splash the Living Water. Oh, there's just so much to read and not enough time to read it all!!

NOVELS: When I'm overwhelmed by all I want to learn, I shut down with a novel. It's so cozy. My favorite genre is historical fiction, but lately I'll dive into anything with quality writing and interesting characters. Recently (like within the past six months) I've started to enjoy literary novels. Water for Elephants was my first. It was amazing! Right now I'm reading The White Mary. It's definitely got my attention.

There you go. A snapshot of what I'd be doing were I on vacation right now. Until the next big trip, I'll chisel away one lone paragraph at a time. So, what's on your nightstand?

Coincidence?

2008-10-02T08:19:00.003-04:00

It has been said: "Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous." Lately I've been thinking (and writing) a lot about the God who sees, how He knows everything about us and loves us thoroughly, how he sees our heartaches and our triumphs, our strengths and our weaknesses. As "coincidence" would have it, two friends recently posted about something similar. To quote Kellie: "God lavishly loves us by knowing the desires of our heart. He knows and understands the longings we don't want to admit we have."

Check it out. Two posts about generous answers to unspoken prayers and the unceasing, unfathomable love our Creator pours out on us.

September Ellie-isms & Zach Attacks

2008-10-01T10:17:00.003-04:00

Ellie: "Mom, you remember that one day? Daddy stayed home and you told me to take him water. And we thought he was sick? You remember that?"
Me: "Um ... sure."
Ellie: "We have lots of memories, don't we?"

Yes, we do have lots of memories. Knowing the leaky state of mine, I'm writing them down. September's quotes seem to fit into basic categories.

Potty Talk (seemingly the funniest thing in our house according to my children)

Rick, spoken to another driver on our way to church: "Get off my butt!"
Zach: "Daddy, you said 'butt.'" (Zach and Ellie start giggling.)
Rick: "No, I didn't."
Me: "Yes, you did."
Rick: "I did? Oh. Sorry."
Zach: "Daddy, you're so silly! You said 'butt' and we're not in the BATHROOM! We're in the CAR!" (The backseat then filled with hysterical laughter from both children.)

Ellie's Translations

Ellie: "I have a 'squita bite on my oboe and it is KILLING me!"
Translation: I have a mosquito bite on my elbow and it really, really itches.

Ellie: "Mommy, I want a snack. Can you give me chores?"
Translation: What are my snack choices?

Me: "Ellie, will you help me set the table?"
Ellie: "Yes, Mommy! I'll get the underwear!"
Translation: I'll get the silverware.

Zach's Stories (For some reason they always involve aggressive crocodiles.)

Rick: "What did you guys do today?"
Zach: "I played trains and then we went to the park and Ellie was teasing me because the crocodile bit my head and I don't like that!"

Zach: "This one time I went to work with Daddy and I got stuck on a flagpole and I was so scared and I couldn't get down because the rocks were too slippery. And then a crocodile bit my head."

Precociousness

Ellie to Zach: "You're going to grow up and be a real man someday. You'll be a daddy to your children and -- "
Zach: "Ummmm ... not today."

Me: "Honey, I need you to wait just a minute."
Ellie: "Um, Mommy? I actually don't like waiting."

And then we have hopscotch, camera-shy girls and silly-faced boys.

Serving whom?

2008-09-29T12:38:00.003-04:00

I'm reading a book a second time. Well, kind of. I got halfway through this book over a year ago, but realized when I tried to pick it up, I'd forgotten most of what I'd read way back then. So I'm starting over and glad to be doing so.

Last week I posted about mom guilt and the impossible task of keeping up with this house. I can work day and night to clean it, but the job is never done. It's not that we're vermin who habitually leave trails of filth and disorder; it's just that we are living, breathing human beings. Oh, and half the household is under five and lacks the desire to put things away or tell an adult when jelly toast gets mashed into the carpet. Isn't there some law of science that says all things naturally go from order to disorder?

But it's also about perspective. The more I clean, the more I find that needs to be cleaned. When toys and books are strewn everywhere, I don't notice how much dust has collected on the windowsills or hardwood floors. I mop and dust only to find clean floors make the slipcovers look dirty. I wash and iron the slipcovers, thinking I'm finally done, then discover a spot on the curtains, dust on the blinds and a suspicious sticky something three feet high on all the doorframes. Everything I clean shines a light on something that could be cleaner. It's exhausting.

Back to the book. One of the beginning chapters talks about two types of housekeepers. The first needs everything to be spotless. Her house is immaculate, always ready for entertaining. She works hard to keep it that way and takes great pride in showing and sharing her home with others. Then there's her neighbor who is so overwhelmed by keeping her home neat that she just can't get it together. She tries really hard, but simply accepts that her house will be a perpetual mess as long as she lives there. According to the author, Cheryl Carter, these two ladies have one thing in common: they are both serving their homes rather than allowing their homes to serve them.

At the risk of sounding like a Brady, I never thought about it like that.

When I clean my house, I think I'm serving my guests, my husband, my family. And yes, I am doing that, but when the need for perfection in every corner consumes my time and energies, I'm not serving anyone but this dwelling. How many times have I made this clear to my children? "I can't play until the laundry is done." "We can't have friends over until the house is clean." "Do you see these dishes? I promise I'll read to you after these are cleaned and put away." I've become a slave to my house.

Don't get me wrong. There are times when these chores need to be a priority. I just wonder if, perhaps, my intense battle over home management stems from serving the wrong master.

Rick went to a ballgame a couple weeks ago. He was out late, so I took the opportunity to make the house shine. Ten o'clock that night found me on hands and knees washing the bathroom floor. When is the last time I put forth that much determination in my devotions? Would I stay up to that hour to read my Bible? Or pray? Whom am I serving really?

The Big Cut

2008-09-26T08:21:00.003-04:00

Alright, I know you're waiting, so here it is.

BEFORE:

And AFTER:

I'm not settled on what I think just yet.

Here's why I'm happy:

My head feels so much lighter!!
I love change.
I look more my age.
I no longer have to put my hair up (in a knot or braid) before going to bed.
My son likes it. He even thanked God last night for Mommy's haircut! How precious is that? I'm now getting hugs without hesitation! I'm no longer greeted with a "Mommy, your hair. Yuck." That's kinda nice.
My husband likes it. I think he likes change more than he'll ever admit. Or maybe Worst Case Scenario Man expected me to come home with a shaved head and maybe a disfiguring scar across my face. One may never know ...
A full 11 1/2" of my hair will help a cancer survivor, thanks to Pantene's Beautiful Lengths campaign.

And here's why I'm not thrilled:

It's not what I expected. Yes, it's a layered cut, but this feels more like #1 than #5.
It feels "inbetween." I'd prefer it shorter or longer.
My highlights are gone. The color feels drab. I almost grabbed some Kool-Aid last night to do some nifty bright red stripes. But then I remembered I'm 31. Oh, and we don't have any Kool-Aid in this house. I may definitely resort to color soon -- in spite of the firm warnings my stylist gave me. She said highlights are fine, but that I should avoid high-maintenance color until my kids are older. I may just be too impulsive to listen.
My son keeps calling me a boy. I know three-year-old sons are not the most reliable sources of style and fashion, but still I don't like being called a boy. He likes it; he just keeps proclaiming (with his charming smile) that I have "boy hair."

For all you super observant people, yes, I am wearing the same shirt I wore for the makeover pictures. Think of it like Trading Spaces. They wear the same shirts two days in a row and they're probably sweaty. Meanwhile, I wore this shirt three weeks apart. Doesn't that make you happy?

And now I can't deny the urge to quote: "My brains, his sword and your stength against sixty men and you think a little head jiggle is supposed to make me happy? Hmmm?" And there is another positive point about this hair! I can jiggle my head all day and my new 'do never looks messed up. How cool is that?

Conquering Mom Guilt

2008-09-25T12:30:00.001-04:00

It has been said we need to believe it all depends on God, but live like it all depends on us. But how do you separate what you think from how you act? Doesn't our behavior stem directly from our beliefs?

All I know is the harder I work, the more I find I need to do. The house is never spotless, the laundry is never done and the children never run out of need for attention. And the more I place on myself, the worse I feel about myself. If my husband cleans, I feel like a horrible wife because he shouldn't have to; I should have done it for him. If my kids are sad, it's somehow my fault. If they use those puppy dog eyes to ask me to play more, then I feel like the worst mother ever, because if I were better, they would be satisfied and happy. My house is a mess because I'm a terrible homemaker and disorganized to boot. We have too much and do too little because I'm undisciplined. Worst of all, I want a cave all to myself, just an hour or so or peace and quiet to do what I want to do, but the fact that I want it so badly makes me feel selfish and ungrateful. For years I begged God to make me a mother, so why do I now long for a lazy, Saturday morning with just me and my husband? Shouldn't I be happy? Shouldn't I be content? A friend of mine, also a stay at home mom, once said she has never felt more fulfilled in all her life. Why don't I feel that way?

Grace is an awesome thing, but it's so difficult to accept. Especially when people tell you you're only frustrated because you're not doing things the right way. If you disciplined your children more consistently or organized your space more efficiently, if you managed your time more wisely, then you wouldn't feel this way. But God gives us grace. He knows none of us is perfect and He loves us anyway. He blesses us anyway. The God Who Sees knows my every flaw and my every striving. He knows I'll never be the stellar mother or exemplary wife I long to be. In spite of this, He still showers me with grace. He still loves me and blesses me and uses me to share His grace with others. All this is testimony to the breadth and width of His power, the immeasurable, unfathomable character He possesses. I stand in awe and boast in Him.

When I see Him as He really is, when I take my eyes off myself and those around me and focus soley on Him, then this mom guilt dissipates. I am confident whatever flaws I pass onto my children, whatever damage I cause, He is more than capable of correcting! And when He fixes all my messes, I can praise Him even more.

"But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
- 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 (NIV)

Announcements

2008-09-23T16:39:00.004-04:00

Okay, I need to answer some questions around here.

About the 'Do:

First, my appointment is set for this Thursday at 4:30 pm EST. I promise to post before and after pictures within 24 hours of the deed being done. Try to be patient, people.

Second, contrary to popular belief, I did NOT rig the contest!! My husband threatened (since he's a computer genius and all), but he obviously didn't rig it either or I would not be cutting my hair at all.

Third, I am taking with me pictures of the first and second place winners. I'm entrusting my hair to a professional. Whichever style she thinks will be best with my hair's texture and thickness will be what actually gets done.

As to color, I really am interested in going dark, but this is where the compromise of marriage comes into play. While my husband does prefer brunettes (I am the one and only blonde he ever dated -- and I won! Woo-hoo!), he doesn't like change. I think a cut is enough for right now. Maybe I'll go dark come winter.

About the job:

THANK YOU, THANK YOU for all of your encouraging comments, emails and prayers! I really, really appreciate it. Here's the scoop. Barclays, a British investment bank, has purchased a portion of the now-bankrupted Lehman, including my husband's job. We're still not entirely sure what this means fully, but it does give us some job security.

No, we don't have to move to England. Just because his boss is British doesn't mean we have to be. And while moving to Europe would be a fun adventure, it's not one I want to take right now. We're planning to stay right where we are for a while. At least until God tells us otherwise.

So things are good. GOD is good!

Two last things ...

Hop on over to MomBlogs and vote for me! Some of you have told me how you don't feel comfortable writing about God or spiritual things on your own blogs, but you love sending people my way. This is how you can do that. I don't get a prize or anything for having the most votes or positive reviews. I don't want everyone to read my blog, just those who may benefit from it.

I want to get to know you better! If you're on Facebook, click here to befriend me.

Elroi

2008-09-20T06:36:00.000-04:00

Those of us who have been believers for a number of years can sometimes glaze over when reading the Bible. Been there, read that, already know the intended application. But sometimes a familiar passage can pop right off the page and open wide your eyes. (I almost said put toothpicks in your eyes, but I didn't want to scare recent recipients of eye injuries. You're welcome.) This morning just such a thing happened to me.

I've been reading through the Gospels. Yesterday Ellie climbed up on our bed before I had finished my quiet time. She wanted to read with me, so I read aloud a few chapters of Luke. This morning I re-read them to catch the morsels I didn't catch with a beautiful four-year-old burrowed in my armpit asking "What happened next, Mama?"

Verse 20: "And turning His gaze on His disciples, He began to say ..." This is the introduction to The Beatitudes. We all love to focus on the beatitudes because they promise blessings. Everyone wants a blessing. But this little half a sentence caught my attention this morning.

Jesus had just finished healing heaps of people and then He turned His gaze on His disciples. No wonder Hagar called Him Elroi, the God who sees. The blessings he spoke of are not meant for everyone. If they were, then the woes wouldn't follow immediately after. Some will be blessed and some will be pitied. The amazing thing is Jesus knew. He still knows because He still sees. He didn't just look at His disciples and make a speech. He turned His gaze toward them. He looked into their hearts, their struggles, they triumphs and their selfishness. He saw their strengths and their weaknesses and He spoke to them with such compassion. He wants to bless those who are poor and weak and downtrodden. He aches for those who bring trouble upon themselves with their pride and arrogance.

He is the God who sees. He sees everything. Knowing this, will we praise Him or fear Him? Hopefully a little of both.

New 'Do Winner

2008-09-19T08:00:00.001-04:00

Thank you to everyone who participated in this historic event! The winner of the You Choose My New 'Do poll is ... (drum roll, please!) ...

# 5: Layered Bob!

This cut received 18 votes for 29% of the vote. (For those truly curious, as of 9:14pm on Thursday, 62 people had voted.)

Some of you were concerned that I had not consulted a professional before entrusting my golden locks to the whims of blog readers. Never fear! I plan to take the three top ranked cuts to a highly recommended stylist. I'm going to let her do what she thinks is best for my type and texture of hair. Also, if you're still concerned, remember it grows back and know that I haven't cried over a haircut since ... um ... well, I think it was middle school. And I've done plenty of drastic things since then. (Have I mentioned the green, orange and purple adventures? They were not the intentioned results. In fact, some so-called-friends still call me "Purp.")

The second place winner ... # 2: Posh Spice, which received 11 votes (18%). And in third place ... #1: Layered Look with 10 votes (16%).

I'll be posting before and after pictures of the actual results when the deed is done.

This was so much fun!! Any ideas for another poll with potentially drastic results?

MIA

2008-09-18T20:27:00.007-04:00

Hey. I wanted to let you all know why I've been absent this week. If you've been watching the news at all, you've heard much about Lehman Brothers and the Wall Street choas. Well, my husband works for Lehman Brothers. At least he has for the past seven years. This week has been ... eventful, to say the least. But I'll be back to my regular blogging self in no time. In fact, tomorrow I'll announce the "new 'do" winner along with the date of The Big Cut.

For now I just want to share a couple verses with you.

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication
with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.
And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension,
will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
- Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV)

This peace that defies understanding, it's tangible and kind of scary. When all this happened with Lehman Brothers, I wasn't worried. In fact, I didn't even think twice about it. I was and am so fully convinced that God is in control, that none of it fazed me. My husband lost his job, our sole source of income, and yet I wasn't worried about a thing, not our mortgage or Ellie's school payments or groceries or health insurance or anything. It was just another day with an awesome God at the reigns. Peace saturated my entire being. The peace was so overwhelming, it was almost frightening.

When the news broke, our phone started ringing off the hook. I received dozens of emails each day offering encouragement and prayer. Each person I spoke with was completely amazed at the peace God gave me. The more people I talked to, the more I started to freak out. If everyone else was worried, shouldn't I be worried too? This is, after all, my life and my family. I should be the one most terrified by the possibilities and the reality surrounding me. All of a sudden panic and fear replaced the peace.

Why? The situation hadn't changed.

But my perspective had. I took my eyes off God. Rather than focusing on Him, I started looking at the situation.

This incomprehensible peace is of God. No other explanation exists. But we canot possess it if our focus strays from Him. Let me encourage you to keep your eyes on God. Those around you may not understand how you can be so confident and at rest; you may not understand it yourself. But don't take your eyes off Him. He is our Source of strength and peace. He the only thing worthy of our attention.

Book Blogger Appreciation Week

2008-09-14T07:01:00.005-04:00

Imagine all your favorite books in the same room. Thow in a bunch of people who also love those same books. Oh, and some free gifts! Welcome to Book Blogger Appreciation Week.

It starts tomorrow! My Friend Amy is hosting and a ton of sites are participating by offering giveaways, contests, author interviews and more. If you love books, you need to check it out. Beginning on Wednesday winners will be announced in the "best book blog" categories. There are several categories!! This means a ton of new sites for you to discover. Are you excited yet?

Chick HERE for a list of what's going to be given away (some GREAT gifts!) and click HERE for a list of who is giving stuff away. Then visit My Friend Amy throughout the week for all the happenings. Happy reading, y'all!!

Puddle Jumping

2008-09-12T13:10:00.002-04:00

It rained much the first half of our vacation. We didn't mind because the storms were mostly at night. You know the kind: a beautiful display of power and nature; the rhythmic pelting of raindrops against our roof and windows. We slept soundly. We woke to dozens of puddles. The private lanes that brought us there, rutted and narrow, were now spotted with reflecting pools. Zach was thrilled!

It was chilly, but having nothing else to do, we decided to walk the beach. This was the first time Zach had been to the ocean since he started walking. (You may remember he didn't walk until the summer he turned two.) I was excited to see his reaction. He and Ellie were both delighted with every little treasure they found: rocks, shells, seaweed, sand. And then we reached the water's edge.

Ellie, Rick and I went right for it, touching the cold surf with our toes, catching the ocean breeze on our faces. It was great! I turned around to find Zach ankle-deep in a puddle behind us. He laughed and splashed and ran back and forth through it. We stood on the edge of one of the earth's largest bodies of water and yet Zach couldn't care less. All he wanted was his puddle. And he was perfectly happy with it. He was content to be a puddle jumper.

My family is in Kentucky. You can't fly there without taking a puddle jumper. You know, the little planes that barely seat twenty people. Why do we call them "puddle jumpers?" They never get too high and are never in the air for too long. They just go from one small thing to another. That was Zach, jumping from one small thing to another.

I watched him delight in his puddle with the whole ocean just steps away. We urged him to try it, just get a little closer. We knew he would absolutely love it, but he resisted. He was comfortable with what he had already found.

I have two thoughts on this. First, sometimes it's really good to be content. We don't always need that bigger house or the more expensive clothes. We don't always need to dive into something new. The ocean can be dangerous, especially for a little guy who hasn't yet learned to swim. The tides can pull you in and under before you know it. Sometimes it's best to be thrilled with a puddle.

But sometimes we are so content with our puddles -- our little, comfortable belongings and lifestyles -- that, even though we're standing right next to it, we never jump in the ocean. We never take the risk and, as a result, we miss out on something so much greater.

So, what is God calling you to do? Is He asking you to be a joyous puddle-jumper? Or is He trying to show you the ocean? Is He, like a loving father, promising His protection and guidance if you'll only jump in?

You Choose My New 'Do!

2008-09-11T01:20:00.002-04:00

As promised, today I'm hosting the first ever "In the Dailies" poll! Yay!! I know, the crowd goes wild. Well, as Monica recently stated so well, "this is a mommy blog, meaning you are all subject to the most mundane aspects of my life." But today, I'm including you in the mundane aspects of my life!

It's time for a haircut. I haven't had one in a year. In fact, I've only had my hair cut twice in the three years since Zach was born. The problem is I can't decide how to get it cut. So I'm going to let you choose.

This is what I look like now.

I'm not unhappy with my look, but I'm ready for something new. Below are some options and you can vote for your favorite. Or just vote to keep it the same. Here are some things to consider:

Rick likes long hair, and it's always important to keep the husband happy. *grin*
I like change, especially in my style. I tend to be a bit drastic with my hair, and Rick is used to this. (In the 13 years we've known each other, my hair has been long, short, straight, curly, blonde, brown, red, auburn, green, purple and striped (with cherry Kool-Aid - that was fun!). Not much would shock him.)
I'm a little self-conscious about my forehead. (I've been told it looks like a drive-in movie theatre.)
I'm a mom and a low-maintenance chick. In other words, my time and motivation are limited. I don't mind taking a few extra minutes to look great for a date or special events, but for day-to-day purposes, I need a 'do that can look decent in less than 15 minutes.

Okay! One last warning and then onto the makeovers: these photos are perfectly unscrapbookable. Up to this point, I've cheated with 'Fro Me to You. Sorry! I'm a scrapbooker and I scrap everything. And I mean everything. But today I'm truly working within the essence of the carnival. The following photos will never, ever see the inside of a photo album.

There are some great virtual makover tools, but most of them cost money. However, if you do a Google search, you can find a number of free ones as well. They usually limit your use until you purchase a membership, but I found the free version met my needs just fine. These first three looks are courtesy of InStyle.

Option #1: Layered something-or-other. (Obviously, I'm not up on my hairstyling lingo.) It's cute and different, but my hair is pretty fine. Too fine for this look?

If you like this, vote #1: Layered Look.

Option #2: A fresh bangs-all-over look. For someone who typically hates bangs, I'm surprised how much I like this. However, I know Mr. Rick would still love me and say I look great, but also know he would miss my long locks.

If you like this vote #2: Bangs All Over.

Option #3: Taken directly from the head of Victoria Beckham. It's angled, artsy and funky. Again, it's probably too short for my husband's seal of approval, but I think it looks pretty spicy. (Get it?)

If you like this best, vote #3: Posh Spice.

And now for makeovers from the second great site I found: iVillage.

Option #4: Here's another celebrity look, this one taken from Jennifer Lopez. I don't know how recent this look is for her, but I kinda like it. It's relatively simple. It's not too drastic a change and still looks long, even if it's not. (A plus for my mister.)

If you like this one, vote #4: J. Lo's Flip.

Option # 5: This may be my favorite, but I'm not sure if I can pull it off. What do you think? It's kind of a rounded bob with some light layers. It has enough body to make up for the missing length, but will this be too high maintenance?

If this is your favorite, vote #5: Layered Bob.

Okay, now we're just getting crazy short.

Option # 6: Pixie Variation. Let's be serious: I'm not going to get this cut.

If you want to vote for it anyway (who knows? Maybe you'll change my mind!), vote for # 6: Pixie Variation.

Option # 7: A straight blunt cut with some color. I may have experimented a lot, but I've never gone really dark. This might be fun! I like the cut, but am thinking the fringe in my face would drive me crazy. Might be investing in lots of barrettes.

If you think this is the best 'do for me, vote for # 7: Dark Blunt Cut.

If you like the color (or would like to recommend another) but prefer a different cut, let me know in the comments section.

So, place your votes!

The poll will be open for one week. I'll announce the winner on Friday, September 18th. And then, of course, I'll post pictures after the deed is done. Should I be nervous?

Oh! One last picture. Just have to show you which hair Ellie liked best. Of course it's a wedding 'do!

Isn't it lovely? For more totally unscrappable memories, visit We Are THAT Family.

Works for Me Wednesday

2008-09-10T08:57:00.010-04:00

God calls us to be good stewards our what we've been given. That includes our money and our talents, but also our time. If you've followed my blog for any amount of time, you know I struggle with organization. I love having everything in order and using my time efficiently so that I can truly enjoy my family, but managing a home doesn't come easily to me. My mother always says "Creative people can't be neat people." I won't say it's impossible, but it sure is difficult! I hate chores. I hate housework. But it's all got to be done and so I strive toward a perfect "system" to keep it all done. I've not found a perfect system, but I have found a tool that works for me.

A month ago I shared with Rick my ideas for a perfect organizer. It would be a calendar with both weekly and monthly views. It would have spots for a grocery list, meal planning and a To-Do list. I would be able to keep track of family appointments, notes, and personal goals. It would be perfect ... if only it existed. I considered making one myself, but the thought alone seemed too labor-intensive and time-consuming, so I put it out of my mind and headed to the grocery store.

Guess what I found there. Yup! My PERFECT organizer!! I was so excited. Here it is. I give you: Mom's Plan-It Engagement Calendar. And this is why it's so great:

Weekly and Monthly Calendar Views
To-Do List: smack-dab in the middle of the weekly view (right where it should be)
PERFORATED Grocery List: This is on one side of each weekly calendar (see the photo below). It's even divided by sections of the store so there's no back-tracking when you get there - another time saver! Did I mention it's perforated so you can just rip it out and take it with you?
Menu Planner: This is on the opposite side of the weekly view (again, see the photo below). Its format is flexible to suit your needs, whether you just want to list meals, assign days or even jot down recipes or pages in cookbooks. (I'm lovin' it!)
Stickers: almost 300 for quickly and easily noting family appointments, school activities and more
Front Pocket: for holding coupons, school notes or things to be mailed
Address Pages: These are divided into sections, too! There's a generic address section for anyone you want to remember, but there are also specific address pages for babysitters, children's friends, restaurants, services (like when you need a plumber and don't want to spend an hour looking for the number) and emergency contacts.
Notes section: blank pages in the back for all your brilliant thoughts and doodles.
Spiral Bound: no more wrist calisthenics trying to write in an awkward journal.
17-Month Format: It actually starts in August to go with the school year and runs 17 months, just in case you, like the rest of us busy moms, can't always buy a new calendar when you really need one.

And all this in a little package. The whole thing measures about 5 1/2 x 6 1/2". It won't fit in my tiny handbag, but it does squeeze nicely into a small backpack or diaper bag. I've had this planner for just a month and already my life seems easier. I'm thrilled with it! It definitely worth more than the $13 I paid for it.

There is actually a whole line of "Mom's Plan-It" stuff -- wall calendars, checkbook calendars, desk calendars. Personally, the engagement calendar is my favorite. I tried the magnetic wall calendar last year and was disappointed. It seemed cluttered and took up too much space on my fridge. Also, it didn't have all the cool features for meal planning and list making.

So there you go. This is my organizational tip for the day, piggy-backing on yesterday's discussion of crazy motherhood. For more "Works for Me" tips and tricks, visit Rocks in my Dryer.

Oh! And come back tomorrow for the first ever In the Dailies poll. I've decided to let YOU choose my new 'do! I've got about 8-12 extra inches of hair on my head and just can't decide what to do with it ... I'll be posting options and you can vote on which I should get. Until then ...

"A capable, intelligent, and virtuous woman--who is he who can find her? She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far above rubies or pearls. The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of honest gain or need of dishonest spoil. She comforts, encourages, and
does him only good as long as there is life within her."
Proverbs 31:10-12 (AMP)

Two approaches to sleep

2008-09-09T06:18:00.009-04:00

I read recently (and I really wish I could remember where) that sleep deprivation is a part of motherhood. (Well, duh!) This caught my memory because the next sentence referenced the Proverbs 31 woman:

"She rises while it is yet night and gets food for her household
and assigns her maids their tasks."
Proverbs 31:15 (NIV)

So, sleeplessness is a Biblical precedent?

Ellie's school starts earlier this year. They moved the whole schedule up by half an hour to accomodate sports schedules for the high school. So, instead of having her there at 8:30, we now need to get her there by 8:05. Add to this my new school-year goal of never dropping her off without a shower (Yes, I did that several times last year, and, no, I wasn't the only one. Several of us who looked much better at pick-up than at drop-off.) and my morning are a little crazy.

So, I've been trying to get up before the sun. It's really hard!! I can't turn on the bedroom light because, well, that would just be rude to my still-sleeping husband. I've discovered I can't take a shower before the rest of the family wakes-up because Zach (a light sleeper and a screamer) is in the room right next to the bathroom and wakes up everyone else almost as soon as I turn on the water. Lately, I've been tiptoeing through the maze of creaky floor boards to "assign my maids" (a.k.a. "me"; I make my daily to-do list and check my calendar). Today (with yesterday) I combined my early-riser goal with a meal-related goal. I've been trying to make meals ahead of time (when possible) to reduce the stress of "happy hour" (the hour between 4 and 6 when the kids go crazy with energy waiting for Daddy to get home while I try to tidy the house and make dinner without losing my mind). (Heather, today I seem to love parenthesis almost as much as you!) I found a recipe in my make-ahead recipe cookbook to try for breakfast. I made it all last night and set it in the fridge so this morning I would only need to pop it in the oven. Unfortunately, the screech of moving oven racks woke my daughter and the "ready beep" of the thermostat woke my son. So now I'm wondering if I shouldn't just stay in bed and enjoy my sleep. But then I think of this verse:

"Don't be too fond of sleep; you'll end up in the poorhouse.
Wake up and get up; then there'll be food on the table."
Proverbs 10:13 (Message)

For those of you who are interested, here's a picture of my completed French Toast Casserole.

It's like a breakfast-y bread pudding, all warm and gooey with a maple pecan crunchy top. Yummmm!!

Be Thou My Vision

2008-09-08T14:19:00.003-04:00

I miss hymns. They have such depth and beauty! Rather than singing the same simple phrase over and over for five minutes, they proclaim doctrinal truths and really get to the heart of the issue. Don't get me wrong -- I love choruses and contemporary worship songs, too, but sometimes I really miss hymns.

One of my favorite hymns is "Be Thou My Vision." We had a good friend play it during our wedding. It was my greatest prayer then and it is my greatest prayer now. I don't know the history of it; just that it's Irish and there is some dispute over how old it is and who wrote it. Since my thoughts today are on this, I thought I would share the words with you as well.

Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

Be Thou my Wisdom, Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee, Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

Be Thou my battle-shield, sword for my fight,
Be Thou my dignity, Thou my delight.
Thou my soul's shelter, Thou my high tower.
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.

Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise,
Thou mine inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of heaven, my Treasure Thou art.

High King of heaven, my victory won,
May I reach heaven's joys, O bright heav'ns Son!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my vision, O ruler of all.

August Ellie-isms & Zach Attacks

2008-09-05T15:42:00.000-04:00

I'm a little late this month. Sorry! Here are the Ellie-isms and Zach Attacks for August.

*****

Ellie: "I love you, Mommy. You know everything about spreading butter. Thank you for teaching me and Zach!"

Zach: "Do you think my fingers can help the pee-pee come out?"

Ellie: "I don't like lobster; I only like shrimp."
Me: "Well, lobster is kind of like shrimp. Just try a little bit."
Ellie: "Mmmmm. It tastes like shrimp. Mommy, you're so tricky. How did you get shrimp inside that lobster?"

Ellie, while eating lobster: "I have a great idea! How about you do the cracking and hunting and I do the eating?"

Me: "Who's a big boy?"
Zach: "Ants. Ants are big boys."

Ellie: "Boys don't like to see girls' underwear, do they, Mama?"

Ellie, singing in the back seat, roughly to a tune from "The Sound of Music": "So-do-la-fa-do-ti-do. When you know the notes to sing, you can sing every song!"

Me: "Ah-choo!!" (real sneeze)
Zach: "Ah-choo!" (fake sneeze)
Ellie: "Zach, are you being a copy cat?"
Zach: "No. I'm a sneeze cat."

First Day of School

2008-09-03T10:19:00.003-04:00

Well, today is the first day of school. Ellie was thrilled; she jumped into our bed at 6am in a very Nemo-like way. You can see she's still sporting the marks from baseball over the weekend.

Zach was just as thrilled to see her go, though you can't really tell in this picture. (He hates bright lights, like the sun.) The first day of school signifies the start of more one-on-one time for me and him. Ellie celebrated with dance and song and kicking us out of her classroom. Zach and I celebrated with Dunkin' Donuts.

Here's to the start of a new year!

Generation Hex

2008-09-02T07:30:00.001-04:00

Did you know Wicca is the fastest growing religion in the United States? Some predict it will be America's third largest religion by 2012, outranked only by Christianity and Judaism. Did you know there are Wiccan chaplains in state prisons? Pagan homeschool networks in addition to private pagan schools? There is even an organization called Spiral Scouts International, similar to Boy and Girl Scouts, currently raising "circles" of Wiccans and other neopagans in twenty-two states. Wicca is just one of several neopagan religions now freely accepted in America. Its reach and influence are both growing, yet most Christians haven't a clue what it is or what it teaches. Those of us who think we know may actually be holding misconceptions about witchcraft and what witches really believe. Others may understand but minimize the relevance.

Scripture tells we're in a battle. We need to engage the culture, protect the Truth and reach out to the lost. How can we do any of that well if we are ignorant of our opposition?

Dillon Burroughs and Marla Alupaoicei (both graduates of Dallas Theological Seminary) have written a great book for this exact purpose. Generation Hex: Understanding the Subtle Dangers of Wicca explains the origins of Wicca, reasons for its rise in popularity, what Wiccans believe and how Christians can engage these lost and searching souls in discussions that point to Truth. I highly recommend it.

It's a short book, only 160 pages, but packed with valuable, easy-to-read (and understand!) information, from interviews with people who practice Wicca to facts from around the globe and plentiful Scriptural supports. I was shocked as I read it at how uninformed I've been.

As a stay-at-home mom I can be sheltered; my exposure to life outside of my church and my little community is limited. I skipped the whole Harry Potter thing and don't really enjoy fantasy stuff. I viewed the prevalence of such entertainment as a cultural shift of preference rather than a barometer of something far more significant. But this articulate and well-researched book highlighted my naivety. I'm not saying Harry Potter is bad or that fantasy converts readers to witchcraft and wizardry; just that an increase in presence reflects society. The more publishers (and film executives) produce along these lines indicates a greater market pursuing those avenues, whether as entertainment or faith.

This post-modern culture in which we live elevates relativity; we honor choices and encourage tolerant communities. This environment makes Wicca attractive to hungry souls. While the religion does hold some foundational beliefs, the rest is very pick-and-choose. What's right for you may not be right for the person next door. There is no hell. Everything good thing you do will come back to you in triplet. You have the power to change things. Celebrate life. Protect the earth. Do harm to none.

There are many good and true beliefs held by Wiccans! But what they hold that is not true can destroy their souls. To quote Richard Howe (as quoted in Generation Hex): "Jesus' command to preach the gospel and make disciples of all nations invariably includes witches. In order to do so, it is necessary that we understand who they are and what they believe."

Pick up a copy of this book. You can read the whole thing in one afternoon. Take this opportunity to learn more about what we and our children may soon face (if we haven't already) and how we can reach out to those who need to know the Truth.

You may purchase Generation Hex through Amazon.com for $9.99.
Click HERE to read an excerpt from the book.

Visit other stops on this blog tour to catch interviews with the authors and reviews from other readers:
A Peek at My Bookshelf
Aspire2 Blog
Be My Guest
Bible Dude
Blog Tour Spot
Book Room Reviews
Camy’s Loft
Christy’s Book Blog
read DB
Fictionary
Footprints in the Sand
From the desk of Flutecrafter
Gatorskunz and Mudcats
Good Word Editing
His Reading List
i don’t believe in grammar
iamhealed.net
In the Dailies
Leap of Faith
Lift My Noise
Lighthouse Academy
L’Chaim
Morehead’s Musings
Mystery, Suspense, and God, Oh My!
One Voice in a Big World
Portrait of a Writer . . . Interrupted
Quiverfull Family
Reality Motherhood
Refresh My Soul
Reiter’s Block
The Friendly Book Nook
The Reel Katie Morgan
The Sosbee Story
Wide Eyed Fiction
Windows to my Soul
Write by Faith
Writing on the Edge

To participate in future blog tours, visit The Blog Tour Spot. Be sure to tell them I sent you!

The Sound of Music?

2008-09-01T22:12:00.001-04:00

It didn't take too long for Ellie to get back to being herself. Before long she asked me to watch a concert she and Zach were doing. She said they would sing "The Sound of Music." Since we had just finished watching the movie, I grab my camera to catch her dramatic talents for posperity. This is what I got.

That is so NOT The Sound of Music. Looks like her musical talents, unfortunately, also came from me. Did you see her scrapes and cuts? Poor girl's face is a mess, and school starts in just a couple days. And what is The Boy doing?? Oh, it just makes me laugh. A great conclusion to our weekend.

Setting my treasure

2008-09-01T13:33:00.005-04:00

Every once in a while Rick has the day off and he gives it to me. He takes the kids and lets me lock myself in a room all day to write. Or better yet I get to go off to Barnes & Noble or Starbucks or wherever. It's a true day of rest for any mom. I love it! Today was one of those days. Rather, it was supposed to be.

I was in the zone. I made a list of things I wanted to accomplish by the end of my Labor Day and started dreaming about a grande white chocolate mocha. Aaaah ...

Rick and the kids were outside playing baseball. Rick had drawn the three bases, home plate and a batters box with sidewalk chalk on the driveway. I could hear them laughing and learning all about Daddy's favorite pasttime. A smile lit my face, then a wail shattered our serenity. I heard Rick burst through the front door as the indistinct sobs turned into "Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!! I want MOMMY!!!!" Isabel was folded in his arms. She had a scraped knee, a cut finger, a split lip and a nasty scrape from her nose to her chin. Poor girl tripped on her way to third.

After we stopped the bleeding and the tears, Rick wondered if he should just never play sports with her. Or maybe only do it on soft grassy areas and with ample body armor. She always seems to get hurt. I responded: "Well, she's not the most coordinated child." Rick grinned with a knowing twinkle that reminded me of my recent post. Okay, so maybe she gets it from me.

My wildly productive day of literary genius has turned into a cuddle-fest with favorite blankies, icepops (to stop the swelling), Cinderella and The Sound of Music. Rick keeps apologizing to me; he wanted me to have my day just as badly as I wanted to have it. But I really don't mind. Some things are just more important - aren't they?

"But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.
For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Matthew 6:20-21 (NIV)

Courtin' Candle

2008-08-28T16:10:00.006-04:00

Look what my adorable husband brought home for me last night.

It's not our anniversary or my birthday; we haven't had a fight recently. It's just one of those no reason gifts. Aren't they beautiful? He actually handed them to me with an apology: "I'm sorry I haven't gotten you flowers in a while." You have to understand, when he says "a while" he means a month or two. Yup, I've got a keeper.

Here's a picture of us almost eleven years ago.

This was back when I was embarrassed to be pictured as a "couple." We were practically engaged, and I was madly in love, but still felt awkward making it so official. Especially when rude people like my roommate would take pictures without warning.

Ah, and here we are when someone actually told us a picture was being taken.

It's nice not having me look like a hyena or Rick looking like he's terrified of his future.

See the candle? Let me tell you about it. I grew up in a very rural area of Indiana, not too far from a rather large Amish community. My mother loved learning about their culture and enjoying their food and crafts. (The rehearsal dinner for our wedding was actually held on an Amish farm.) This was way before Beverly Lewis made it popular. Yeah, Mom liked Amish before Amish were cool. *grin* Anyway, Mom found this "courtin' candle" and quickly made it a tradition in our family.

Now, don't quote me on this because we may have heard the story wrong, but, as I understand it, a father would set out this candle when boys came to court his daughter. The base of the candle is a spiral with a wooden center that can be twisted up or down to raise and lower the candle resting inside. The young suitor could stay until the candle burned down to the top of the spiral. So, if the father liked the boy, he would raise the candle to give this fella a nice long visit. If he didn't, the candle was lowered to make the date short and the father's feelings obvious.

The first picture was taken the first time my mother met Rick. Unfortunately, the candle kept falling out of the holder when she cranked it up. We did the best we could.

Almost eleven years later we're still together and still crazy in love. He still buys me flowers for no reason.

I am often hesitant to broadcast the success of our marriage. I don't want to be prideful or arrogant; I don't want to brag. I know so many people who are hurting, friends whose marriages are falling apart or held together by a string and single friends who long to have a husband or wife. I always feel mentioning how happy I am may seem like rubbing it in their faces. That's not my intention at all! And I really hope no one takes it that way. Sometimes I just need to shout how great marriage can be!

I've had many people ask me what our secret is. I never know quite how to answer because I don't believe there is just one secret. Communication, unwavering commitment, encouragement and trust all play a part. Sharing the same faith and same sense of humor are also huge factors. Accepting and forgiving one another even when you know the worst parts of each other. In other words, it takes work! There is a lot of advice I could give couples, but my advice is actually for parents: pray for your kids and their future spouses.

My mother prayed for Rick before she knew his name, even before I was interested in boys. She prayed my whole childhood for the man I would one day marry and she continues to pray for our marriage every single day. The same is true of my mother-in-law. She prayed for me for years before we met and she still prays for us now.

"The prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with. Elijah, for instance, human just like us, prayed hard that it wouldn't rain, and it didn't—not a drop for three and a half years. Then he prayed that it would rain, and it did. The showers came and everything started growing again."
James 1:16-17 (The Message)

Pray for your spouses. Pray for your kids. Pray for your kids' future spouses. There is no limit to what God can do! By praying you can be part of it.

For more trips down Memory Lane visit We Are That Family for the 'Fro Me to You Carnival.

To Be Like a Fly

2008-08-27T08:29:00.000-04:00

A week ago I mentioned watching a fly for fifteen minutes. Have you ever done that? Just sat there and watched a fly? They're actually pretty cool. This particular fly was on my windshield. He sat directly in my line of sight while I began the monotonous trip home from Philadelphia.

I didn't want to flip the wipers and smear bug guts all over the window, so instead I played a sadistic game of testing his strength. I watched him intently while speeding through residential streets en route to the highway, waiting for him to flutter off into oblivion. He didn't budge. I suspected he was dead, but no; I saw him wash his filthy little face at the red light.

As a side note, does anyone else find it ironic that flies who typically buzz around garbage or feces are still concerned with personal hygiene? Of course, he could have just been licking his lips. I may be giving him more credit than he's due.

The light turned green, so I began my fun little game again. This time I watched my speed, too. Ten miles per hour; nothing. Fifteen miles per hour; still nothing. Around twenty miles per hour I saw him hunker down closer to the windshield, but then I caught another red light.

Now this was interesting: while we were stopped, he shifted his position. Up to this point he had been kind of diagonal on the windshield. Now he moved to align his weird little fly body his with his head straight down (toward the hood) and his derriere up (toward the roof of the car -- yes, I still refuse to call my vehicle a "van").

With his new position, this little bugger held on until almost seventy miles per hour! I'm not exactly sure where I lost him; I was trying to watch traffic, too, but I know it was somewhere between fifty and seventy-five. Isn't that amazing? His little fly feet could hold him tight against glass, a surface with no traction, while facing a wind resistance up to seventy miles per hour!

We need to have faith like fly feet.

"Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful." - Hebrews 10:23 (NIV)

Have you ever let go of your faith? Maybe not your faith, but your convictions. I tend to think if everything is going smoothly, then I must be doing what God wants. When the first big wind comes, I doubt what I thought to be true. I'm not talking about abandoning my beliefs or Scriptural truths, but rather what I think God wants me to do -- this ministry or that, this path or the one over there. When resistance comes, rarely is my first thought to hunker down and cling tighter to my convictions. Instead I think "Well, I must have been wrong" and I let go.

I know I'm fallible and God is not. Who am I to believe I can fully understand His wishes for me? But who am I to think I deserve a smooth ride just for doing what He asks?

So this is what I've learned from a fly:

Hunker Down: When resistance comes, cling tighter to what I know to be true. Hebrews 10:22 says "let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith," (NIV). We don't hold tight because of arrogance or pride, but rather, as The Amplified version states, an "unqualified assurance and absolute conviction engendered by faith." Trials naturally bring doubts, but we cannot allow resistance to make us doubt what we know to be true. Draw nearer to God to solidify your faith and those absolute convictions.

Best Positioning: We are fallible. We make mistakes. Sometimes we need to reposition ourselves to better handle resistance. If we're not aligned with God, we won't be as aerodynamic as we ought to be; we'll make ourselves an easier target, suceptible to failure. Instead, if we set ourselves up for success (by walking with God and eliminating distractions), we can make it possible through the power of the One capable of ensuring it.

I would like to add that it's okay to fail. Unfortunately, my illustration doesn't go that far. My fly friend may be plastered on the grill of whatever car was behind me. Good thing God loves us more than flies (Matthew 6).

So what have you learned from unexpected sources?

Flat-footed measles patient

2008-08-23T16:20:00.006-04:00

I have probably four different posts rolling around in my head, good posts about spiritual lessons and deep insights, but instead I figured today I would regale you with child-induced injuries I've acquired. I'm not talking about the stretch marks or other fun side effects of becoming a mother. I'm talking about the battle wounds of being a mother. Still don't know what I'm talking about? It's dangerous playing with kids! Just this week I've gotten a flattened foot, a hole in the head and a bump on the nose.

Maybe moms aren't supposed to play like I do. (There certainly were several moms who watched with shock as I rolled at break-neck speeds down the big hill in front of our church.) Maybe our bodies are beyond the point of surviving childhood games. (Said mothers also laughed heartily as I nearly broke my neck crashing into the concrete bench at the bottom of said hill.) Thinking like that just makes me feel old. I'm only 31, people! I should be able to splash in puddles without getting stares, right? And people shouldn't think me strange for climbing trees. (That is until later when they witness me walking "with a hitch in my get-along" from straining my groin getting up there.)

Maybe I'm just unlucky. Take the hole in the head and the bump on the nose. The bump on the nose was absolutely no fault of mine. I was outside talking with a friend and watching the kids thoroughly enjoy the playground when a bee came out of nowhere and stung me on the nose. I haven't been stung by a bee since I was ten years old! So now I look like Rudolph.

A flat-footed Rudolph. Oh, I didn't mention the Jeep running over my foot? Yup. A big pink PowerWheels Jeep driven by two four-year-olds. We are in so much trouble when these girls are old enough to get a license. So, yeah, a flat-footed Rudolph.

Well, until today. Now I look more like a measles patient thanks to the hole in my forehead. How did I get the hole? Well, the kids and I were playing Hide and Seek at the park. Someone had recently trimmed the big willow tree so we couldn't hide under the low-sweeping branches like we usually do. Instead, Ellie and I tried to hide behind the trunk of the tree while Zach counted. Apparently the tree-trimmers didn't expect 5' 8" people to be standing so close to the tree. Trying to be quick and sneaky, I absently impaled my forehead on a freshly trimmed (not so smoothly, I'll add) branch. Yup. Big red bump on my nose, nice big hole in my head. The good news: it stopped bleeding before Ellie could stick a princess band-aid on my hairline.

Karen is probably rolling right now because she knows none of this has anything to do with motherhood. She witnessed several of my accident-prone moments in college. Like the time I victoriously stomped on a lonely dandelion only to march headlong into a tree and split my lip open. Or when I bruised my cheekbone by falling asleep at Pizza Hut and hitting my face on the table. Or hyper-extended my back learning to dive at camp. (This, however, was not the same day when I split her lip open with my elbow while she was teaching me how to dive.) Or when I got pink-eye three times in one summer. Or my wedding when I caught my veil on fire. Or a couple years later when I lost all my toenails after walking twenty miles in the rain for breast cancer.

Okay, so maybe it's just my fun life. Good thing I have a sense of humor. And I heal quickly.

I try to keep this site clean, but ...

2008-08-20T08:11:00.005-04:00

... with a boy in the midst of potty-training who will do anything to make his sister laugh, it's difficult. Here's a direct quote from this morning.

Zach: "Mommy, I've got a package for you. It's in here." (Being completely serious, he then pointed to his nether-region.)
Me: "Um ... what is it?" (At this point I'm getting nervous because I never know what to expect with these kids.)
Zach: "It's a package. You know what's inside?" (Still pointing.)
Me: "Your diaper?"
Zach: "Nooooo. What's inside the package, Mom?"
Me: "I ... have ... no idea." (Meanwhile Ellie starts giggling like I'm missing out on the funniest joke ever.)
Zach: "It's poopy. And it's for you. Do you want to open my package?"

Yeah. I should go take care of that.

More on that fleeting feeling of intimacy

2008-08-19T13:30:00.002-04:00

Yesterday I wrote about the temporal nature of intimacy. Someone commented that after being gone for so long, I sure came back with a depressing post. *grin* Well, it wasn't meant to be depressing. The truth is intimacy is not fleeting, but the feeling of it may be.

This morning I read another chapter in Blue Like Jazz. I'm loving this book, but because of all the other things I'm reading at the same time (Thank you, ADD.), it's taking me a while to finish. In the portion I read today, the author, Donald Miller, wrote about how people can't stay happy for long periods of time. He said: "Joy is a temporal thing. Its brief capacity, as reference, gives it its pleasure."

I like that. It reminds me of something Ted Dekker once wrote on his blog. He was asked why he writes so specifically and graphically about evil. He said: "I refuse to become complicit with evil by characterizing that nasty, nasty stuff in a way that softens its destructive bite. Doing so would not only be deceptive but it would undermine the great victory won by our hero in His majestic defeat of this terrible villain called evil." Now, he's talking about good versus evil and I'm only talking about the varying degrees of feeling close to God, but it's the same point. You need contrast to recognize value.

In other words, without times in the pit, those mountain top experiences I spoke about yesterday wouldn't mean as much. If we felt high on grace and blessings all the time, we wouldn't treasure them as much. They're presence would become mundane, ordinary, expected. Diamonds are not precious because they're found in every back yard. They're a treasure to be sought after and showcased when found.

In the same way we should seek after those moments in which we feel overcome by intimacy with God. We need to work at our relationship with him and treasure the moments when our security in Him matches our emotions toward Him. But we also need to praise Him for the down-time that highlights those awesome moments in perfect communion with Him. Without the valleys, the mountains wouldn't seem so great.

Temporal Intimacy

2008-08-18T07:49:00.006-04:00

The past two weeks have been amazing! I'm glad to be back, but am now faced with the thick reality of how temporal the experiences were.

A week ago Saturday I drove home from Philadelphia. It was early morning. I spent my first fifteen minutes on the road watching a fly on my windshield. When that thrilling entertainment came to an end, I turned on a worship CD.

I love driving by myself. As I let my mind wander and my heart sing, unbidden tears streamed down my face. I didn't even bother to wipe them away. I felt they were washing me clean as God revealed Himself to me. All the wonders I've taken for granted, the blessings I've felt entitled to, the miraculous journey He's enabled me to take. I was overcome by humility, honor, and gratitude. Why would the Creator of the universe take an interest in me? Why would He care what happens to me? I belted out praises to Him. I confessed and prayed and then sang some more.

Now, we're back to normal life. Vacation is over. My mountain-top conference experience is past. School starts in a matter of days, my calendar is already filled for the next few weeks, and where has my praise gone? It's been shelved, as always happens when I get back to "normal" life. I hate it. I love those moments of intimacy with God! Why is it so difficult to maintain that closeness? Why, when I get in my routine, do I prioritize sleep over quiet times? Why do deadlines and schedules make my faith robotic? Do I really believe five minutes in the bathroom is enough to feel close to God?

Making time to be still is difficult, but it's so worth it. What helps you find that time? How do you keep your relationship with God fresh? What do you do with "broken appointments" with Him?

Quick Update

2008-08-07T06:08:00.002-04:00

The speech therapist did not have a noticeable accent, so that was cool, and Isabel is already saying "yellow" instead of "lello." :) In other news, I'm going to be away for a week or so. I'm attending a writers conference today and tomorrow. (Please pray for me that God will be glorified by my presence here; that I learn much and seize available opportunities.) Then on Saturday we're leaving for vacation. (Yeah!! The kids can't wait to get to the beach.) I'll fill you in on everything when we get back.

The beginning or the end?

2008-08-05T08:42:00.002-04:00

Let me apologize in advance to my readers from New Jersey.

Ellie starts speech therapy today. (If you're wondering why, check out this post.) It may be the beginning or the end. When we had her evaluated a couple weeks ago, I was excited about the help she would receive. I thought about how much easier it would be for her to learn to read if she were actually pronouncing her words correctly. Yesterday she tried to tell me that "yellow" starts with 'L' -- "lello." Imagine if her phonics actually matched her enunciation! Well, the excitement lasted about twenty minutes into the one-hour-plus evaluation. It was at that point I heard the specialist ask a nasal "Which dawg has a lawng tail?"

Today may be the beginning or the end. If the therapist assigned to our case talks like that, I think we're going to have to quit. I mean, do I really want to pay someone to teach my kid to talk with a Jersey accent? Aren't all therapist supposed to be accent-free?